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Question #1241817710Friday, 8-May-2009
Category: ENFp INFp Advice Relationship Love
Here's a question for anyone who may know the answer. I am an INFP, in a sort-of long distance rel. with an ENFP. I say sort-of, because I don't know how to define it. We've never discussed what we are. We just are. We talk every day. We have a great relationship, even though it's so far apart. They tell me about what they're thinking and feeling, and I do the same with them. They constantly come to me with anything they're thinking about doing, any decisions they feel like making, to get my take on them BEFORE they do them. We have pretty regular intimate relations via phone, at least 2-3 times a week, sometimes more. They miss me when they're not able to get a hold of me, which I gather isn't normal for ENFP's? When I say miss me, I mean I am constantly getting messages asking "where are you?", checking up on me if they haven't heard from me, etc. But, we haven't gone one day without talking in almost a year. They've told me, though only a few times, that they love me. It's usually during intimate moments, though it has been said outside of that. So, I guess my question this normal for an ENFP? It's been almost a year, and they haven't really shown any signs of being bored with me. We connect on a level I've never connected with anyone before, and losing them scares the hell out of me. But, I don't know what we ARE! And I really would like to know what all this may mean. They know I love them. I'm a lot more open about telling them, then they are about telling me. Help! -- Anonymous
Your Answers: 1+
A1 Your being played buddy. Move on. -- Anonymous
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A2 I'm an ENFp and the only person I've never gotten tired of is an ISTp. I find INFp-s very annoying. -- ENFp
A3 Maybe they didnt confess their love over and over because they thought you wouldnt believe them and accuse them of lying and usually I (enfp) like to say it only when i feel pangs of affection which happens usually when I see the person I love or when he says something incredible on the phone that makes me love him so much, because then it's genuine but since you guys were in a long distance relationship I can see how that can put a strain on the relationship (unless you guys are talking on the phone often). But other than that it's pretty hard to feel pangs of affection and confess love when we're not talking clearly. Like I feel my emotions almost getting there but not enough or fully since I simply can't let them, unless they win my trust (by talking directly to me and coming through with promises and making an actual effort) and make me feel safe enough to genuinely love them. Yeah, I usually find taking indirect communication trivial and not worth my attention because I believe that if they really need me to listen or pay attention to them, then they would come/talk to me directly instead of by something stupid like songs (unless they tell me specifically it's dedicated to me. its pointless and worthless if not) or something they post on myspace (unless the post includes my name or something) and I have trust issues (btw i've read the disorder enfps are most likely to have is paranoia), i cant trust someone's intentions enough to take indirect communications seriously. And since my hidden agenda is to know, enfps need to know for sure. Hope this helps. -- an ENFp
A4 INFp or INFj? -- Anonymous
A5 quadra spin -- .
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