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Question #1210914288Friday, 16-May-2008
Category: ENTp ESFp Relationship
I am an ENTP currently dating an ESTP does anyone have any advice/ problems i should watch out for? -- katie
Your Answers: 1+
A1 Um..tricky one..cause there will be good there..but maybe ESTp will try control you a little, but you will maybe look for someone who will take care of you instead? Sorry if that too vague -- Anonymous
A2 A1 what do you mean control me a little? Why will I look for someone to take care of me? (sorry i'm a little new to this:) thanks for your help though) -- katie
A3 ESTp's like to sort of be the leader of a relationship, almost but not quite to be in charge, whereas with you being ENTp you would probably be looking for someone like your dual, who's not really interested in the power but in but is more interested in looking after their partner. This is my observation fwiw -- Westie
A4 Hi Westie...Leader in what way? So ENTp's look for parteners to take care oof them? Thanks:) -- katie
A5 I would say that ENTPs and ESTPs are generally comfortable with each other, have a lot in common and yet what the N lacks, the S makes up for and vice versa. Yes, the ESTP will probably take the lead sometimes, but generally, the ENTP is up for the ride. I've noticed that if the ENTP doesn't want to be lead, then they won't be. I think the only thing that would get in the way of an ENTP and ESTP relationship is that sometimes the ENTP thinks more and the ESTP wants to simply do more (not that the S doesn't think, but that they don't want to think more than act). This, of course, all depends on the strength of your N and their S. I am an ENTP in Socionics and and ESTP in Myers-Briggs. I have a great friend who is an ENTP all the way. -- M
A6 I am also an ENTP female dating an ESTP male and i'd just make sure that he realizes that you will need more space than him. my ESTP is very understanding. oh and i hope that you have a VERY high energy level. A plus is that they are fairly easy to relate to and you can always see the child in them. it's cute -- Anonymous
A7 A6!!! thats so true i have realised i need more space then him. i find him almost clingy to me i cant stand that. And i have sooo much energy! they are easy to relate to and he is childlike sometimes. -- katie
A8 i am an entp and was married to an estp for 15 years. we were able to accomplish quite a bit together. we kind of saw things the same way and worked well together. the trouble came in because neither one of us was any good at feelings, emotions, relationships (the F) and what's more we both needed a partner who could provide that. the relationship fell apart, but only after extreme stress. if you are planning on big career moves or kids with estp, plan on having a lot of stress. both types are EP temperament, which means that you'll both tend to take on a lot of projects and have a lot of energy. but both will have trouble relaxing, too. over time, the relationship became quite competitive also, kind of like a war between Ne and Se. Se usually wins and this got old. Overall though it's a pretty good relation, and if you can plan for how you will work together around stress and feelings and relationship issues, it could go well. -- Anonymous
A9 I am an entp in MBTI and socionics. I dated a estp for awhile and it was alot of fun. You're definitly correct in needing lots of energy with them, but I loved it. Unfortunatly much like A7 she became very clingy and always wanted to know where I was/what I was doing. I never did anything in my mind to warrant such insecurity from her, usually I would just be driving around and think of something and off I went to the hardware store or my buddies house to talk about it. Lol, ya the whole driving around to help think of things stopped with the gas prices. Anyway, I probably could have handled the situation better than I did, I just broke up with her and told her she was getting to clingy and annoying, but if you try to work on those issues than perhaps you'll have a better outcome than I did. Lol, guess I'm kind of an ass. -- Anonymous
A10 Oh geez. Well, firstly, the ESTP is going to look for a "playmate" not a "mindmate." He will never "get" you, and is really just in it for the fun, but when the fun runs out, so will he. -- entp who has dated estps
A11 i´m an entp dating an estp. i cannot share any of my thoughs with him (or just briefly, not satisfying), but he fills my time with other kind of activity, which is ok to me. there´s no need to have an "all inclusive" partner, if you have some N friends to take a deeper conversation with. i especially apriciate his energy, he keeps me from turning into my mind too much. if you don´t search for a perfect relationship (if you accept his ignorancy to theories), there is a lot of enjoyable about him. i can also see he´s trying to take control of me, and i´m letting him do so only in "S things", which i guess to be an acceptable compromise for both of us. we just have fun together all time long, and he´s the one who has the best ideas how to get the most of it. i like that -- Anonymous
A12 Hi. I'm an entp married to an estp. I'm a woman. I read that men are more commonly entps and estps. So you think it matters that my personality type is more male dominated and that might effect how I should approach things? My hubby just took the test I sent him today. I've been reading up on entps all week and know somethings. Its important to me that I understand him and myself and figure out how and where to compromise. One thing most important to me is quality time with him. I find we know that to have very different meanings. He doesn't like doing much with me other than watching movies and having me sit on the couch next to him while he plays his sports video games. I love video games but I enjoy first person shooter and fantasy where he doesn't like either. What are some good tips for encouraging him to go out (and actually enjoy whatever were doing) with me? We just recently went bowling. He agreed to going mid week and I had been building up entrance excitement for days. We did go, although we played one game and then he wanted to leave. Before today I didn't realize how important winning was to him. All I know was that he enjoyed compitition. He won so I'm not sure why he didn't seem to have had a good time and I wasn't far behind him on the score board so I'm sure I was compitition. Anyhow, I feel like I might be more of someone who wants to have fun and do activities. I've even asked to play his basketball video game and go to the court and play basketball but he's unenterested in either. I'd be perfect if he'd teach me how to play lol. I think I'm pretty competitive too however if winning makes him happy and enjoy an activity with me I'd gladly loose. Anyhow, how do I figure this all out? Also, I want him to understand me too; any tips on how I can make understanding me fun and exciting? Thank you. -- Anonymous
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A13 My experience with ESTps romantically is that it works pretty well if you two genuinely like each other (MBTI and socionics aside). My absolute favourite thing about ESTps is their playfulness and blatantly changeable attention span- they're always interesting. One thing might be the extent to which they can appreciate your NT- while T gives you similar interests and focuses and they have the capacity to appreciate your N- I feel like there's a threshold there to which they can tolerate it, if you get what I mean. As an ENTp, I use both quick and sharp humour but also appreciate lengthy and analytical humour. The ESTP is likely to reject the latter but thoroughly enjoy the quick witticisms. I don't think ENTps and ESTps are the 'perfect' pairing- having said that when it comes to romantic relationships there are so many other factors depending on your individual situation. Flirting with ESTps I find is so fun and never really innocent because of the pairing, so they really are just a lot of fun. In terms of full intellectual stimulation they might not be up there with you. Again, if you want fun I think ESTps are your best bet. One thing that might be a problem could be a lack of material to analyse in them as people. Idk. Depends on your ESTp. -- ENTP
A14 Entp just has few days with Estp, he swept under my feet, as Entp trying to analyse the experience too much already gave me head ache. I think they can help us balance to live in the present. I am enjoying it for now. Update in the future. Also we are older may be some of out rough edges are a bit softened. -- Selam
A15 Yes, the fact that there is probably at least one ISFP in your daily routine so much better, that you think is uninterested, yet is absolutely crushing probably madly in love with you and would fulfill you so very much more relationally than this ESTP buddy. But this ISFP might be too shy to say it... -- Anonymous
A16 I think happiness is helping together for fun.. I feel like it's good to recalibrate love to balance between love and hate and I like the idea of consciously "controlling" our emotions because usually emotions aren't patterns in time that just happen, if we decide we want to feel inner happiness or have our invisible smiles all the time, we can feel happy and think about things we like that doesn't affect others and it forgives the past.. Helping people because of feeling love makes us remember and have the feeling of resentment but helping with friends because its fun teaches everyone something new and makes things fun, easy and better for everyone. Memories that are pleasant help us understand our emotions because in that moment we can forget, and we can do the mathematics of emotions when we feel relaxed and it helps us understand more along with having helpful knowledge. Personally I think it also helps to spend some time talking with and thinking about a few people who we know are our most compatible, because many times we don't realize or see from a different perspective that was complementary to what we expertise or don't know about that our most compatible doesn't know or a pro at, so it helps us feel happier and more motivation to be happier and help others feel happier as well. So it's amazing to love in romance because it helps us be used to working in happiness and boredom rather than too much tension of always needing to and causing trouble because of the lack of understanding or feeling the peaceful happiness at least sometimes etc. Its nice to know emotions and talk about things so we don't have to worry about someone being too unhappy etc because we realize what all helps to feel relaxed, motivated and happy -- Anonymous
*Please note that the opinions expressed are not necessarily those of socionics.com*
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