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| Question #1192342628 | Sunday, 14-Oct-2007 |
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| What type do you reckon would not openly show conflict, or infact shy away from it, yet experience jealousy against you and try to plot against you behind the scenes? -- ISTp |
Your Answers: 1+ |
| A1 I don't know exactly which type, but I had a close acquaintance who did just that. Small set-ups to beat someone at something insignificant (a game for example) taken as though the fate of the world were at stake, accumulated complaints blown off all at once in angry rants, etc. He would frequently add little twists to words said previously to instigate conflict where there was no real cause for it; this was done privately so that he could have pre-convinced a dopey crowd. He'd very often bring up local gossip on who'd lied while he lied frequently himself (and became very irritated if this was ever mentioned even though it was often obvious). I eventually had to cut the guy out because I got the feeling I was talking to a girl. If this sounds familiar, confirm, then maybe someone else can better answer the question. But I'm not sure if it was a matter of type or pathology. -- Anonymous |
| A2 It is similar, although infact it is a girl! We have been friendly for months and she has always laughed at my jokes and listened to me. This is my first major job and I been here bout half a year she has worked there for a lot longer and been higher up in the work 'heirarchy', but now that I am performing better than her she is almost like 'out to get me' This line of thinking is foreign to me as a friend is a friend regardless of status. I just not sure how to protect myself against or call a halt to such deviousness..esp as I see no need for it..i'm not one to be threatened by personal successes of others so this way of thinking is foreign to me -- ISTp |
A3 It seems to me that this has something to do with valued Se. You being an ISTp, you would value Si rather than Se, so for you success is measured by how comfortable you are, not how high up the hierarchy you are. Since your co-worker seems threatened by your success, I suspect she has her valued Se as a weak function - if it were one of her strong functions, she would probably feel confident enough to confront you more openly. This leads me to suspect she is either INxp or ENxJ. As for what to do about it, I have no idea. I am but a poor, socially-oblivious INTj, after all.  -- Krig (INTj) |
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| A4 Oh, in a job situation it's just trying to survive. This is a common conflict in workplace. You might get gather informations about solving conflicts. My first idea of acting is: Instead of letting it get you, you should go openly to her, talk to her, first words should be adressing her fears - try to read what her hidden need is (here she is afraid of loosing her rank), try to signal her that you have to work together, otherwise both might get bad evaluations or other bad consequences (figure out yurself, I dont know about yur job). If this fails, tell her you will inform your boss, if this fails, go inform your boss and if he is a good boss, he will invite you both for a meeting, so you three can speak it all out. Dont loose your head, stay calm, because if you get upset, the conflict will grow and nobody wants to take sides. -- Anonymous |
| A5 I would check out the _STj profiles. They both like to be as high up as possible. My first guess is ISTj, but I could be wrong, of course. -- Kanerou |
| A6 I have an ISTJ (and INTJ,ISTP) Brother, and he can be very sarcastic, trowing verbal gut blows, we always fought as children (I'm INTP) he almost thrives on some conflict, I guess he finds it more interesting that way. However in a work envoroment he is actually very easy to work with, especially if he gets to be the one in charge. My ISTP brother also works well with him. -- INTP female |
| A7 As a fellow ISTP I get this often too. Seems, out-of-the-blue, sometimes people get very angry at something I've done or said, even though I havn't a clue that I've done anything. I really don't try to cause pain for anyone unless they REALLY do wrong, and am always shocked when I anger someone else by my actions. People are strange. Try to talk to her, but don't be surprised if she clams up. Then I don't know what to do to resolve the problem. -- Anonymous |
A8 Sometimes it infuriates me that I do things to meet people's needs and my reason for doing somethings are purely because they want me to, and nothing is done for my needs even when I asked. But whatever, I gained much peace after concluding that I was looking for my needs from the wrong person and moved on. But I've never plotted against someone behind the scenes. Thats too much negativity for me and it goes against my morals. One thing about ISTPs is that they sometimes enjoy testing people's patience and doing things they know would offend and upset the person their close to, and mind you I'm one of The most laid back persons to people and I HATE playing police to ANYone as I hate it if someone else does that to me. So usually they bring out the me that I hate which makes me more mad (which they seem to enjoy immensely). Not only that, after they do something after the offense they think is "nice" (in my head that doesn't change the fact of what they did/said), they forget what offense they committed two days ago. And if I'm still mad about the thing they did or said a couple days ago, they get flabbergasted and go "WTF did I do?!?" You guys seem to have a bad long term memory. And for me to be close to someone/rely on them, I need them to remember what they did, understand why I didn't like it, genuinely feel sorry about it AND most importantly - guarantee it NEVER happens again. So anything closer than distant friends is a disaster for me.. guess I could bear close friendship with ISTPs if I have an INFJ or ISFP in a relationship with me to cushion me to keep my sanity by supporting and comforting me when I complain about how an ISTP hurt me and drove me up the wall. Butttt I'm sure us ENTPs have plenty of "bad" (its a subjective word!) qualities that makes some other types mad just like all types. And I think ISTPs plenty of good things about them. They seem oblivious to other people's feelings so that might upset people by coming off as inconsiderate and/or uncaring. I think they are highly sensitive people, so the threshold of being considerate to their feelings is comparatively higher, which makes them feel hurt more than other people as the commonly used level of consideration of feelings is low in the society SO they sometimes either care too much about people's feelings which is obviously exhausting and restricting, and then occasionally too less.. especially when they have been hurt.. which I guess happens too often  -- ENTP |
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