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| Question #1178214085 | Thursday, 3-May-2007 |
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What are ESFp women with  subtypes like? What are their strengths, weaknesses? How can you recognize one? -- Anonymous |
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A1 How can you recognize one? Look into the type characteristics. They "take on" many forms. Their faces are smooth, they tend to be a little plump, or at least with a round face, with expressive, lively eyes. When in a company, they smile a lot and are spontaneous, original, friendly and talkative, and they have their own, personal approach to everyone and everything. From time to time they tend to just sit and watch the events intently and think about their things. On that occassion, they may have an almost hostile expression, but it is really only an expression, since they are genuinely friendly  Well, and their strengths? They are great at creating an easy athmosphere, bringing about the best in people, they are flexible, able to grasp concepts and thoughts quickly, to undertake many different jobs and roles, to communicate good sides of people and things, they usually are good storytellers, good at organizing interesting activities, often creative and practical, excellent "ice-melters" with people that are considered too introverted or strict by other types. Their weaknesses are their small tolerance to criticism and stress, constant need of good-working relationships and new impulses. They tend not to be punctual and coherent. Although they grasp quickly, they are not so well able to explain how they grasped them. When their Fi is not developed enough, they tend to be too flexible and not able to say No, or stick to one belief and to promote it in an intolerant way. Although they are extroverted and friendly, only few people really know their personality, their inner opinions and thoughts, because of their hidden Fi. Is that enough? Any other ESFPs out there, so that it is not just me describing myself and my friends? -- Ezis |
| A2 A1, thank you so much for your meaty response! And do these ESFp friends of yours also take tests and score ESFp, or do you just know that they are? -- Anonymous |
| A3 How can an ESFp develop more Fi? -- suni |
| A4 Well, they did not take the tests, I just think they are ESFp. Thats why I was asking for more responses, in case I was wrong. About developing Fi - I am not so strong in describing the personality dynamics, and my English is not so good. Maybe better look at personalitypage.com. My basic idea was that if ESFPs relied too much on their primary function, that is, Se, they could forget to develop their inner values that help them determine who they are and what they want. -- Ezis |
A5 Hi Ezis, your English is better online than many native speakers! My guess is that ESFps who rely too much on Se would be live pretty impulsively, resulting in wasted energies on things they never really cared about in the first place. Could these even mean frequently wasteful career paths? How else might Se without Fi look? I struggle too much with who I am and what I want, and experiencing a semi-midlife crisis. Everything I used to do, relationships I used to have, even earnings - for all my time and energy poured into a million endeavors, heart and soul, I currently have near NOTHING to show for it. Nothing but a lot of new decisions that need to be made to get on track and establish something. Does this sound potentially ESFp-like? Over the years, I've periodically made lists of the things important to me, in effort to focus them: subjects I enjoy (for work and hobby focusing), preferred working conditions, and even inventing categories for my relationships and classifying people I knew accordingly in order to try and establish some consistency and perspective in my relationships. Perhaps this was an attempt to deepen Fi? But I don't think it ever helped much. Felt good at the time, but hard to integrate with what was available in the real world. I've experienced so much disappointment in life, it's been a struggle to even care about my own anymore (but I still care about others, for sure). But that's improving a little. Inwardly, I've become too pessimistic, but don't express it much. I think some around me instinctively sense it and see its unattractiveness, and avoid me. Does any of this sound to you like something a troubled ESFp might face? (Maybe not).  -- Anonymous |
| A6 To the poster of A5. Yes, you sound just like many esfp's I know, although you could potentially be enfp too. Usually at mid-life, if you have ignored it, your under-developed Fi starts to remind you of it's presence, precipating a crisis. This, often stressful time, brings out your least developed functions, but in a negative way, which is your Ni, leading to pessism and doom laden feelings for the future. The remedy is often to re-focus on your Fi, to rediscover your true priorities in life, using your Se to fulfil them. -- karen |
| A7 A5, thank You a lot for praising my English! In a month, I am sitting my B.A. exam in English, so its really encouraging Yeah, your description looks exactly like an ESFP. I know this "people sense this and avoid me" pretty well. It is difficult to give advice, as I am not a psychologist, but from my experience I know that faith, irony and especially self-irony help a lot. Also concentrating on one activity, studying or learning something in depth, like playing an instrument, singing or driving a car. In short, improving your abilities in one field. I have read in a book on personality type that the midlife crises are normal, that they help us look at our personality from a different point of view and not to get stuck in our usual way of behaviour. Otherwise we would become a caricature of our self. For example, if we ESFps were lively, active and endearing the same way until 80 years of age, we wouldnt be nice, but ridiculous. Yeah, Karen, you are right, focusing on our Fi -values and feelings can help a lot, as this is one of our basic functions. But it is focusing on our terciary function - Te - that is, logical thinking and the ability of irony, information gathering and of explaining - that is crucial later in life. The book said that terciary Te could lead the extroverts like us to blaming the outer world for something that the world actually has not done. Introverts have problems with the outer world, we have them with our inner world - thats perfectly normal. So relax and think about your inner world from different points of view, but dont cease to be active, its your forte. Am I clear enough? Keeping my fingers crossed for you -- Ezis |
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A8 Karen & Ezis, your input has been so helpful, thank you. By the way, EZsiz, you seem to use the word irony too liberally - maybe ask someone to help you get a sense of the more precise definition. And good luck on your exam!!! I can see now how my Ni has been unconsciously roaring at me these last 4-5 years. It's been a dark and rough ride. There was SOMEthing of a clearing, and then I was forced to make a major Fi decision. So I had chosen to take up formal studies again of a thoroughly Te subject. It FEELS irresponsible, but I "know" it's not. Yet there is this inner nagging for now seeing immediate results, and for not learning a specific pragmatic skill, and for not having much income for the sake of study.  ( I have always pretty much learned them on the job, on the spot, in engineering and IT roles - excellent troubleshooter. The challenge was fun, even if the work itself seemed dull and not very important. Technology's always changing anyway, I'm reluctant to even commit to learning yet another one to be phased out soon. Can any ESFps relate to this? Anyway, I still struggle against the doomed feelings for my future. Much work to do to climb out of this hole. But I'm a seed, now, germinating again. ) By the way, never in a million years would I test as an ESFp per the standard tests, rather, strong IN since I was 15. But the intertype relations finally make sense when I try on ESFp and then evaluate them with tons of people I've known. It's uncanny how they finally click! I have so rapidly rounded out and developed various functions into a rather dense, bit complicated packet. Often, people seem to only like me for superficial reasons - being smiley and cheerful, helpful, upbeat - or even "beautiful". Once I get serious and start to express myself, most back away. It's like they want a greeter, a model, a plant - not me. But not the INTp. THEY can take it. It's SO refreshing. No wonder ESFps claim to be so "misunderstood," reading the profile on this site. There are probably tons of 'em who test INFx, or INxx. You guys have been tremendously helpful in the info you've provided. I can't believe how relevant it all is. I'm so eager to learn more about ESFps now, especially Fi subtypes. Thank you and God bless. -- {Q, A2, A5} => ESFp |
| A9 Yeah, I think ESFPs relate to your description. They are troubleshooters, they want to see immediate results and they learn on the spot. They like challenging jobs that change a lot, but as they are S, they do not get used to changes so easily as for example ENTPs. - I have also experienced turning from an INFj to ESFP, and also discovering relationships with INTPs practically and theoretically. Both is really very refreshing. Nice that we have similar experiences There are definitely many ESFPs out there testing as IN, and its a pity. -- Ezis |
| A10 The last few times I took typology tests of any type, I was an ENFp. I've always thought of myself as a solid ENFp. But I've changed a lot within the last year, due to various means (and I'm only 18, so I'm still growing into myself and more prone to change than someone old. I think this change is genuine). And then I was pegged as an ESFp by someone. I was surprised, but it happened a few more times, so I retook a bunch of tests and... I was beginning to that that maybe I am an ESFp. And you all solved it for me by sounding exactly like me. Thanks! heh. -- Lena |
| A11 And you sounding exactly like me I was also classified as an ENFp several times. But I am too down-to-earth to be an ENFp. Glad we could help. Welcome to the ESFps-who-know-their-type lot! -- Ezis |
| A12 I'm an esfp, observe me, and you take it from there. lol http://www.myspace.com/pele39sjoints -- Anonymous |
| A13 -intp-@aA8, ..no that is good. because INTPs often occupy specialist areas, and feel themselves to be fit in a specific way for a spec task...it is not often that they will be undone, or respect intellectuals of other clibre. however, this 'spot' logic allows us to appreciate the WANT of having a very specific learner...such as the esfp. Guess what they say of the Mongols learning to ride from youth...is essential in our mutual esfp/intp system. no, A12, i would not observe, no time has been budgetted...also, it was good that ignorance protected me before...i still need to practise 'fighting' -- @sirac |
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