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Old 18/05/2012, 09:32 PM
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complicater-complexer complicater-complexer is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2006
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Default Oh these INTj's!

I am learning quite a bit about INTjs, since my advisor is INTj.

One problem I tend to have with him is the following:

I usually get very suspicious when people aren't willing to honestly justify themselves when prompted for, or when they refuse to listen to me. I start wondering whether there is something they are trying to hide.

That's what frequently happens with my advisor, I think he has hidden bad intentions or he is being dishonest. Others usually are scared to talk to him, because he replies aggressively and can be quite brutal, but I personally, though I might be scared, if it doesn't make sense to me not to talk about something because he doesn't want to hear about then I tell myself that it is finally my right because such and such, and find to myself all reasons why I am righty in what I am doing. Finally if I am not doing something wrong, then he can't do anything cruel to hurt me, because anyways if he kicks me out in reality, then he will have to justify himself to others. So if he does something very aggressive, then I can take it against him (well as you can see I always go very far in my thoughts).

So I put pressure on him by talking about the thing he doesn't want to talk about, and even if he gets aggressive once, I retry. And it usually works!!!

Today I made him give me a long explanation, and I was happy, because I understood finally that he is not being dishonest or bad or something. He tells me that he can't always justify himself because that takes him energy, but that I should have faith in people. Unfortunately I came across as sensitive while he was talking to me.

As a side note, I don't see myself in a supervision relationship, I don't think a supervisor would get sensitive in front of his supervisee.
"To live happy, live hidden."
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