Go Back   Socionics Forums > Ramble Mumble

Ramble Mumble Anything goes, but please make an effort to stay positive and keep it socionics related.


Reply
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 05/02/2006, 03:29 AM
alphaquerist alphaquerist is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 23
Default Relations of Benefit???

I need a few explanations of the relations of Benefit.My parents are into a relationship of benefit( ESFJ & ESTP). I too am with an INFj (me an INTp). My questions are

a) could it be that I am unconsciously mimicking the pattern set by my parents? does socionics provide any explanation for the behavioural patterns of groups? Or is just one's type & choice of partner the answer to most of relationship questions?(i mean even though we may be a particular type, do we still get influenced by the way other types around us interact with one other, and get into the same pattern?)

b)can anybody provide a functional analysis of why a particular type is repulsed yet seeks help from the person they don't like?
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 05/02/2006, 03:33 AM
rmcnew's Avatar
rmcnew rmcnew is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 111
Default Re: Relations of Benefit???

My parents also had a relationship of benefit [ISFp/ISTj] when they were together. Essentially the benefactor thinks that the beneficiary has a strength that he or she does not have, and that is what draws the benefactor to the beneficiary. However, because of the suggestive 5th function the beneficiary blows-out of porportion the amount of interest the benefactor has and over-estimates and may even fantasize reasons that are not attune to reality.

For example, my mother has told me numerous times that she only really married my father because it seemed like he had a certain strength even though she rejected my father 3 times when he tried to porpose for marriage, yet my father recounts that he only porposed once and she had the total hots for him.

I believe my mother, I think my father is full of crap and his account is not really what happened.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 05/02/2006, 03:41 AM
rmcnew's Avatar
rmcnew rmcnew is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 111
Default Re: Relations of Benefit???

.....
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 05/02/2006, 03:43 AM
alphaquerist alphaquerist is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 23
Default Re: Relations of Benefit???

Mine gave me a tough time and for a whole year I locked myself in my room and would go out only to school. Also I was labelled difficult because they cudn't understand me. The minute I met this INFj it was like I cud talk about all my woes to him and he would listen. I too wud listen to his problems and therefore, we became very good friends. I know I never want to give up the love he has to offer & yet, his Judging criteria gets on my nerves.

Tx to Socionics I was able to pin-point the area of discomfort.or so I think.(I wud still need s1 to give me a functional analysis of the relation of Benefit b4 i know for sure)

Is there a difference in the relations of benefit b/n Extroverts and b/n Introverts?
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 05/02/2006, 04:03 AM
rmcnew's Avatar
rmcnew rmcnew is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 111
Default Re: Relations of Benefit???

Quote:
Originally posted by alphaquerist:
Mine gave me a tough time and for a whole year I locked myself in my room and would go out only to school. Also I was labelled difficult because they cudn't understand me. The minute I met this INFj it was like I cud talk about all my woes to him and he would listen. I too wud listen to his problems and therefore, we became very good friends. I know I never want to give up the love he has to offer & yet, his Judging criteria gets on my nerves.

Tx to Socionics I was able to pin-point the area of discomfort.or so I think.(I wud still need s1 to give me a functional analysis of the relation of Benefit b4 i know for sure)

Is there a difference in the relations of benefit b/n Extroverts and b/n Introverts?
Well, there might be a functional analysis of the relationship of benefit somewhere for the INFj/ISFp type, but the only definate sources I know of that would even remotely contain this sort of information are untranslated and in the origional Russian.

However, I have a few links from my website you can look at that might help you if all else fails

http://socion.info/MODELARELATIONS.jpg
http://socion.info/typrel.html

You can also try looking at:

Dmitri Lytov's website
http://www.socioniko.net

Rick DeLong's website
http://www.socionics.us

Sergei Ganin's website
http://www.socionics.com
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 05/02/2006, 04:08 AM
rmcnew's Avatar
rmcnew rmcnew is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 111
Default Re: Relations of Benefit???

Quote:
Is there a difference in the relations of benefit b/n Extroverts and b/n Introverts?
I think there is a slight diffrence for each type due to the diffrent functions, but the way it happens is basically the same.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 05/02/2006, 05:27 AM
alphaquerist alphaquerist is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 23
Default Re: Relations of Benefit???

Tyvm rmcnew. Socionics.us was informative in many ways. Apart from talking about new issues related to socionics it also explained some well known ideas from a very different perspective (esp the idea that not having ppl of duality, activity, semi-duality etc, around one self while growing up can distort one's personality)
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 05/02/2006, 11:11 AM
SG's Avatar
SG SG is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 2,521
Default Re: Relations of Benefit???

Quote:
Originally posted by alphaquerist:

a) could it be that I am unconsciously mimicking the pattern set by my parents? does socionics provide any explanation for the behavioural patterns of groups? Or is just one's type & choice of partner the answer to most of relationship questions?(i mean even though we may be a particular type, do we still get influenced by the way other types around us interact with one other, and get into the same pattern?)
I was wondering about the same phenomena as well for a while. I don't think it could be explained by socionics alone. I reckon a good psychologist might have an answer as to why and how we copy our parents. Besides they love all that "you and your parents" stuff .
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 05/02/2006, 01:10 PM
Nyx's Avatar
Nyx Nyx is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 226
Default Re: Relations of Benefit???

I think it's inevitible that we will be effected by the relationships of our parents (or whoever is primarily responsible for our upbringing), and that it had some impact, even if it's minimal, on our behaviour towards others (especially potential partners and our children). This is our earliest model of human interaction, and it's bound to leave its mark, whether we like it or not.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 06/02/2006, 11:53 AM
alphaquerist alphaquerist is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 23
Default Re: Relations of Benefit???

Right now I am in the field of education. I had a talk with one of my professors who is a psychologist. A few things came out
a) he had not heard about socionics
b) he is most probably IxTJ which I am sure coloured the discussion
c)according to him it all amounts to categorising people & thereby not giving them a chance to manifest their behaviour in other alternative ways as also not reaching out to them because of our categories.

Personally I feel that socionics has explained a lot and yet one often has to transcend the given in order to get along with those around.(all these views have been previously discussed too, so nothing new here)

What I am wondering is
a)do we also have a psychologist amongst socionists?
b)isn't it possible to marry psychology with socionics (it deals with psychology in many a ways)?

Given the condition of people in a fast moving world, even if socionics tells them about them and others , it still leaves the questions of hurt and trauma unanswered.

couldn't we have, for example, a functional analysis of where ppl get hurt(in their feelings and mind) and how to overcome it? if it is already there, someone pls send me a link. ty
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 18/02/2006, 05:01 PM
Nyx's Avatar
Nyx Nyx is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 226
Default Re: Relations of Benefit???

I'd be very interested to hear the answer to the above questions by someone with expertise in either (or both) field(s).
Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT +1. The time now is 06:30 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2007 SOCIONICS.COM