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  #1  
Old 19/12/2010, 05:28 PM
Hazard Hazard is offline
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Default ENFp and ESFj love relationship?

I (ENFp- ENFP) have has a relationship with this girl (ESFj- ESFP) for a long time. We've hardly ever argued save for maybe two times when we broke up five months ago which were brutal though short. At the time of the break up we ha been going out 7 months and now after another 5 we are considering getting back together. The reasons we broke up weren't because our relationship was bad because it was in fact really good and we helped each other out alot, but for personal reasons on her part. I'm hesitant to get back together with her though because I know if we do it will probably be for a good amount of time. So I'm really interested in hearing how are natural beneficial relationship would affect long-term romance. Any observations you could make would be helpful. Thanks guys!
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Old 19/12/2010, 07:04 PM
Cyclops Cyclops is offline
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If she's ESFj, I dated a benefactor for a long time and the relationship was really good.
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Old 19/12/2010, 08:36 PM
Hazard Hazard is offline
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Awsome. Was it good for her too? That's what I'm mostly worried about. Thanks for the input.
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Old 19/12/2010, 09:09 PM
Hazard Hazard is offline
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That's good to hear. I'm sure I'll love being in the relationship very much but I guess what I'm worried about is her feeling like the Benefactor or leader in the relationship. I'm sure I'll love it, but I'm just worried about her.
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Old 20/12/2010, 02:59 PM
Cyclops Cyclops is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hazard View Post
Awsome. Was it good for her too? That's what I'm mostly worried about. Thanks for the input.
Yeah it was good for both of us. We dated for maybe two years.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hazard View Post
That's good to hear. I'm sure I'll love being in the relationship very much but I guess what I'm worried about is her feeling like the Benefactor or leader in the relationship. I'm sure I'll love it, but I'm just worried about her.
I dated her before I knew about socionics. I dunno we had a lot in common which I think helped. Overall we just had fun. In my opinion most inter-type relations can work given the right conditions or something.

I even have respect for some of my conflictors, although they can frustrate me.

I dunno about life time compatibility outwith quadras, I haven't lived that long yet :S

Last edited by Cyclops; 20/12/2010 at 03:00 PM. Reason: Automerged Doublepost
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Old 18/01/2011, 08:37 AM
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Butterfly Butterfly is offline
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How would it make you feel seeing her date another guy?
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Old 12/07/2011, 09:18 PM
chinosleep chinosleep is offline
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Hmm this benefactor dynamic is a very strange one. You'll always feel like your second or slightly less significant but whats annoying is you can see their blind spot and you'll constantly be wanting to assist them in that. As for psychological intimacy you'll probably be a bit frustrated by the other somehow thinking their 'better' all because they can do what you find difficult. Although when they do find out your even more than capable. Hmmm I dunno. Seeing these two interact (benefactor and beneficiary) can be painful to watch even. You two dont entirely share the same beliefs but the one thats always in the better place, will probably listen to you. I still cant say what I make of this relationship. ....
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