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  #1  
Old 07/01/2006, 01:30 PM
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Default Dangerous Duals

This is the thing. If you have got to interact with two people who know each other and happened to be Duals, especially from a different quadrable than you – never ever take any sides!

Because Duals in general are so obviously different they can't help but notice the differences. Even if they have already realised the benefits of Duality relations, it does not stop the Duals from complaining about each other to other people.

To an inexperienced viewer this might create an impression that the two Duals are not getting on together well. The Duals might tell you all sort of stuff about problems in their relationship and it might even be true – do not get involved, do not take any sides.

Duality relationship is self-sufficient and requires no interference from outside. As soon as you get alliance with one of the Duals you loose. The Dual bond is incredibly strong although it may not be obvious for an outsider and it may not even be obvious for the Duals themselves. Once you've taken sides you soon realise that you've been betrayed and you're up against a mighty strong opponent. The message is clear: "Do not interfere with Dual affairs or you'll be punished".

It's a trap, stay out of it.
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  #2  
Old 07/01/2006, 06:52 PM
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Default Re: Dangerous Duals

Is this duality. I knew a gril. We were different. She was emotional and always seeking for a company. She liked to be with somebody and to talk and have internesting time with people. She didn't like to be alone. She was ESFj.

We were different. But yet, when she spoke, I felt like she speaks exactly like I do. She thought like I did, but yet, her thoughts seemed to me very improtant. They were smart. She was emotional, I was philosophical and abstract. But yet, we liked the same things in life and people. We didn't like the same things. Our emotional life was different, but our minds were the same.

When we were together, I always felt like I had just met her, but really, we didn't meet for months. I felt like she is the most interesting person I know. With her, I felt like I was in home when we were together. I was relaxed with her. This feeling of relaxation is undescibable. It was an heavenly feeling. We calmed dawn and started to notice that we speak like each other. She spoke like I do and I spoke like she did. We were so familiar that I felt like she is my life long wife.

When we left away, we both felt that we came dawn to earth from the heaven. When we were together, it was like we were the only people in the Universe. And then this miracolous dream had suddenly ended and we both were haveing tears in our eyes when we said good bye.

Some times I felt like I came a part with her.

But now she is gone. She has INFp boyfriend. I couldn't stand it. It hurt a lot to see her happy with someone else and never- ever haveing a thought that there could be something between us. When yesterday my depression attaced me again, I asked help from her. And she said she can help me, we could be friends, but never lovers because there is only one man in her life, that INFp boyfriend. I felt my self very ill. So I sayd to her that they will not stay together for years because they have very different personalities. She was insulted. So our friendship ended. She suggested to find another friend for my self. She hasn't reply to my e-mails. I feel my self terrible.

I feel like something really beautifull has ended. Like she had died. I am becomeing to understand I loved her. Deeply. And now we will neve meet each other again.

P.S. Please edit my posting so it would be grammatically more correct.
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  #3  
Old 08/01/2006, 07:20 AM
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Default Re: Dangerous Duals

I once knew an ESFj girl that was in a relationship with an INFp. He must have had a P.H.D. or something that kept them together because as far as I can recall she was unhappy and cried a lot. It all looked a bit masochistic to me but what do I know, people get kicks from all sorts of weird endeavours. I have no idea if they are still together but in my experience ESFjs fall for ENTps more often than for any other type. But then it also often ends up in tears. ESFj is not exactly easy-to-cope-with type, unless you're some kind of INTj. Well, having said that even INTjs may find it difficult at times.
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Old 09/01/2006, 04:07 PM
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Default Re: Dangerous Duals

Sorry! I made a mistake. That boyfriend of her is not INFp. I don't know who he might be , but he is rather INTj or INFj not INFp. And the specie of their relationship is good makeing me all most absolutly a looser. They really love each other and she wouldn't deffinetly want me instead of her boyfriend. How to deal with imposssible situation? Only time can heal our woums.

BTW, I was overly sentimental in my last post. Way too crieng. I'm sorry for my emotional blah-blah.
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  #5  
Old 11/01/2006, 01:53 PM
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Default Re: Dangerous Duals

I know several couples that fit the initial description rather well. Not to say that they are duals, but I've learned not to get in the way of their arguments, even when asked to do so. A general rule to follow when dealing with touchy-feely stuff.
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Old 12/01/2006, 07:52 AM
DavidD DavidD is offline
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Default Re: Dangerous Duals

Did you have her take the test? Was she your dual? I have yet to meet a person that would not take it. Both me and my business partner, work it into most new relationships so we know who we are dealing with, quickly. Guessing is a fools game, if you can have actual answers from test results.

We do out best in social situations to ask various question to try to pin down some of the letters at least. Ixxx xNFx xNTx etc etc

What you describe could be a dual relationship, or it could be a desctructive one-side codependent relationship that was doomed to failure because of the emotional immaturity of those involved. Not an insult, just pushing some talking points, that definately applied to me in my early 20's.
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  #7  
Old 19/01/2006, 03:38 AM
wolf la jingga wolf la jingga is offline
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Default Re: Dangerous Duals

Quote:
We were different. But yet, when she spoke, I felt like she speaks exactly like I do. She thought like I did, but yet, her thoughts seemed to me very improtant. They were smart. She was emotional, I was philosophical and abstract. But yet, we liked the same things in life and people. We didn't like the same things. Our emotional life was different, but our minds were the same.

When we were together, I always felt like I had just met her, but really, we didn't meet for months. I felt like she is the most interesting person I know. With her, I felt like I was in home when we were together. I was relaxed with her. This feeling of relaxation is undescibable. It was an heavenly feeling. We calmed dawn and started to notice that we speak like each other. She spoke like I do and I spoke like she did. We were so familiar that I felt like she is my life long wife.
I think so. I'm not sure, really. Actually I have a close friend/ my best pal who is happen to be my dual. I'm INTp and he's ESFp. There is no touchy feely things like your case. In fact I havent found out any ESFp girl yet (its hard to confirm people type).

Anyway, I share sort of the same experience but not really like your case. We are not gay anyway. The things is we are so different yet have so many in common. I'm iNtuitive and he is Sensate yet we had many similarities.

So I say what you are experiencing is probably a Duality. Yet I don't think that we will eventually end up with are Dual. Maybe the one you share your life is other than a Dual. I guess not everyone are bless with having a Dual as a life partner.
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  #8  
Old 02/02/2006, 11:33 PM
NoiselessAardvark NoiselessAardvark is offline
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Default Re: Dangerous Duals

Would the same thing apply if you were dual to one and identical to the other? What if you talked about it with them while both were present?
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  #9  
Old 05/02/2006, 11:41 AM
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Default Re: Dangerous Duals

Quote:
Originally posted by NoiselessAardvark:
Would the same thing apply if you were dual to one and identical to the other?
Which "the same thing"?
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  #10  
Old 05/02/2006, 11:57 PM
NoiselessAardvark NoiselessAardvark is offline
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Default Re: Dangerous Duals

The backlash
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  #11  
Old 06/02/2006, 01:03 AM
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Default Re: Dangerous Duals

Sure, why not. If the other two have already established connection between them and you are the new guy, then you have a fair chance to get whipped as well.
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  #12  
Old 10/02/2006, 12:40 AM
Topaz Topaz is offline
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Default Re: Dangerous Duals

Once a girl confessed to being nice to my best friend (my dual) only to get next to me. I was livid and let her have it, not only for using him (he fancied her) but for causing divisions between us. He eventually cooled our friendship, which caused me great saddness My dual and she are conflicting types and though I doubt that she'd ever respond to his advances, if she ever did I'd have my revenge on both of them
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  #13  
Old 10/02/2006, 08:55 AM
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Default Re: Dangerous Duals

Nah, you'll make up with your friend, she is the one that got screwed by the looks of it.
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