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| Question #1238444304 | Monday, 30-Mar-2009 |
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Hi everyone! I just wanted is it common for ISTPs to push the ones they like most away.. I mean do they have a tendency to treat people that are somehow special to them in a different way than others - like acting really strange around them? I wondered is it true that ISTPs fear the ones they love more than other people?  Thanx 4 taking the time to answer ! =) -- Some really crazy ISFP |
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Your Answers: 1+ |
A1 I thought its the relationship (like rejection, losing the closest ones, being hurt, expectations) they fear rather than the person they like the most. According to a website describing the MBTI ISTP: "Usually, the ISTP has trouble finding and maintaining a love relationship. The ISTP usually has very simple needs and expectations from their mates, and they're surprised and confused to find that their mates have more complex demands. They feel inadequate to meeting their mate's needs, and begin to get very uncomfortable with the situation as they perceive that they are expected to do something that it unknown to them. They back away from the relationship. Outside of a relationship, they feel more unloved and unappreciated, but are afraid to commit to a relationship because they fear rejection and hurt." Makes some sense.. Although I personally don't understand what kind of complex expectations they don't have that their mates do... i thought most people would want reassurances and affirmations that they are loved and wanted just like ISTps. And about the acting strange bit, well, don't we all feel nervous around people we really like, and act strange out of nervousness sometimes? I certainly do.. but I usually just assume people love me anyway  And i think its absolutely adorable when someone is nervous cause of someone, it makes me feel hopeful that so much attraction that it creates this effect among couples is real and it exists ... I think it would be amazing (maybe not realistic) to be able to feel nervous and giddy around my sig. other occasionally and make him feel the same even when i'm over 60... <3 -- Anonymous |
| A2 BTw I'm sorry for the mistake in my question I meant I just wanted to know is it comon... (blush) -- Anonymous |
| A3 Well, I am currently with an ISTP who I have known my whole life. We have been together for a long time and I must say that the hardest time of our relationship was the first few years. We were young and he was-ill say, curious to the world around him. ISTP's are fascinating once you get through the hard parts. I was a very emotional teenager, so when he would push me away, I would come back just as strong. Thinking back-I feel ashamed for having ran back to him the desperate way that I did, but I suppose it was meant to be that I did that because years later-after spending years a part, we made it back to find each other. I know he cares for me and it does not show it often. I usually am clueless that he cares for me until BAM, he'll ask me out again or pay me a compliment. Few and far between, ISTP's will swoop into the emotional rescue when they NEED to...and it feels really special when they finally do. ISTP's will treat you COMPLETELY differently from how they treat other girls...problem is they are so private that you really have no way of knowing yourself or reading from them that you are that special one. In my case, I grew up with this particular ISTP, so I had mutual friends who would come to me when we were apart telling me about what a player he was and how good he was at playing nice to get a girl to sleep with him or to give him something that he wanted. It was only when that happened during our break that I realized how much he cared for me because of the significantly different way he treated me from those girls i heard about. (i'm not gonna tell him) <3 As for fear? Like I said before-although ISTP's don't like to show their emotions a lot, they will be brave when they have to be. If they really, really wanna ask you out, they will. That's the best way to tell with an ISTP...wait it out, don't expect them to give you the world, and when they do, you'll really appreciate it-if not, move on....ISTP's have a very ugly side as well that might not give two S*itties about leaving you broken hearted. So be fore-warned! Although the love of an ISTP is very difficult to attain, it's more than worth it when you get there-but on the other side of the spectrum, it can be very, very dangerous territory emotionally. best of luck and i hope this helped :] -- Peggacorn<3 |
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