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Question #1203813415Sunday, 24-Feb-2008
Category: ENTp
ENTps, would you mind describing the ways in which you are warm-hearted? Something I noticed was that many ISFps on this site said despite the fact that ENTps are supposed to be their duals they wouldn't consider a romantic relationship with one because many ENTps come off as cold/unfeeling/uncaring/inconsiderate. I suppose ENTps wouldn't win a prize for being warm or anything but at the same time I really don't think that all ENTps are cold and unfeeling. -- nachos
Your Answers: 1+ 20+
A1 I'm almost definitely an ENTp, and I'm a pretty warm person. I usually score as an ENFp. You don't have to be unfeeling to be an ENTp, you just have to put logic first ...some people see me as being unfeeling and uncaring, but it's just because I'm considering the same problem from a different point of view (putting the consequences of an action in perspective, for example, instead of focusing on the intentions of the action) -- ENTp
A2 They're warm once they become attached...I'm an INFp and by closest friend is an ENTp. -- Anonymous
A3 uh-huh. warm to the point that we could get mistaken to be Fs, but only to select people we surmise that we could get along well. otherwise, the ice queen facade is on. -- marga
A4 maybe im just a different type of entp ( i am an entp), but nothing makes me more frustrated (and upset)than hearing people calling me "mean" or cold hearted, etc. because ive heard it many times in my life when that totally was not my intention and all it did was make me feel horrible that being myself was coming across as something so bad. it has actually affected how i view myself and my self esteem. And what just makes it worse is when i read comments from isfps (perhaps one of the few types i would hope that would understand me) saying how they view entps in the exact same way. It troubles me because, i know in reality that i am very sensitive person underneath, the only way i can keep my sensitive-ness protected is through being rational. I dont know about other entps, but i have a very big concern for people and the global scene and am currently working towards becoming a humanitarian/aid worker. this is all because of my deep down sensitiveness. So, I wouldnt say that entps are uncaring... based on my experience, id say the opposite is true. -- Tricia
A5 Good response, Tricia (A4). Us T's need to dispel the myth that we're insensitive and unemotional. Truth is, we're not as emotionally resilient as the F's, and so are more sensitive (and vulnerable) in ways than many people realize. -- Anonymous
A6 My dad's an ENTP, and he can be very warm and caring, and has tons of compassion for people, he can also be hot tempered, selfish, unsensitive and if you cross him or hurt him to many times (I mean the big stuff, that anyone would get hurt from), then watch out. I can deal with how he is simply because I know that he loves me. It is much more dificult for me to deal with my INFJ mother. -- INTP
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A7 I may have said this before, but sometimes ENTps tend to make careless comments that would easily set me off said by someone else but I don't think it's a big deal because of the INTj-ENTp type relations. Someone outside the alpha quadrable would probably be quite upset by some comments ENTps make, which, although ENTps are very smart people, would probably puzzle many ENTps. Also, the 'Tp' preferences together indicate that ENTps tend to outwardly display emotion, although a person would observe that their normal reaction to just about anything might appear to be logical and left-brained. Typically ENTps would think something, based on what they feel, and show the emotion based on what they think (irritated, amused, etc.). Contrast this with a feeling type - believe me, with an ENFp the process of showing emotions is much less complicated and more direct! Which ironically would be less apparent sometimes (Fp preferences together). -- econdude
A8 A4 is spot on. I AM a caring person, whatever people might say. All my life I've cared for the "weak" and exposed people. Be they poor, children, shy or opressed, I want to help them. I think its simply a matter of ENTPs seing the big problems and ignoring the small ones, such as the neighbours dead cat or whatever. -- Anonymous
A9 I feel very protective of people I like- That is, if you hurt me I'll try hard to force myself to let it go and move on, but if you hurt my friend I will do my best to make every second of your life hell. I volunteer on a weekly basis to work with extremely disabled children and visit old-age homes when I have the time in order to chat up the bored and the senile. But I feel as if I'm doing this because it's nice to do, not because of some deep compulsion or whatever. I am willing to sacrifice time and effort for others, even if it leaves me in a bad position, but that is because I assign a quantitative worth to helping others and then analyze whether what I will lose outweighs the intangibles (a feeling of self-worth springs immediately to mind) I will gain. Usually I'm not losing anything I consider horribly valuable (A letter-drop in a grade, meh). The main problem would be that I take a long time to get strongly attached to people, mostly because I'm not very trusting and don't want to allow myself to open up to anyone unless I feel /certain/ they won't betray me (An obviously flawed approach). Therefore, most of my relationships I could survive losing, because I operate on the assumption that that is a possibility. And that would, I guess, be why some would say ENTp's are cold-hearted... but we're not, we're just paranoid. We still need and give love and affection. I guess there's also the sense of detaching myself from my emotions and observing them. But- And i'm sort of losing coherency so I'll stop there. -- Anonymous
A10 I think the problem for an ENTP is expressing their caring with words. I know an ENTP that cares a lot about me, but he demonstrates it in ways that might not convey affection except to those who understand him. He'll make me laugh, show me neat stuff he found or show off his wacky inventions. He'll fix things that are broken and share whatever he has to share. Sometimes his "input" can feel like criticism but I know that's not how it's intended. Many people do not pick up on the subtle "I care about you" underlying meaning behind his actions. -- Anonymous
A11 I am an ENTP, I come across as being cold because I don't really go in for all that cuddly huggy stuff. I don't tell people how much they mean to me, and I tend not to show affection in "normal" ways. If someone can't just trust that I care, then I don't need them as a friend. And I really don't care about other's feelings. People need to learn how to deal with that stuff on their own time. I am rather logical, and often don't even notice emotions. I am a Vulcan. -- Anonymous
A12 I am an ENTP female who works with many ESFJ's in a traditional and I would venture to say largely conservative female dominated occupation. Through years of interaction with ESFJ's I have come to both better understand myself as well as others. I come across as happy, cheeful and energetic, and caring. I have learned that to garner the trust and respect of ESFJ's I have to honour my word, listen empathetically to their emotional venting, and give them lots of advanced warning about changes. I tend to work on the fly, changing my approach many different times before I settle on the plan I will execute. That's why I prefer to work alone, so I only have to deal with myself. But my jobs involves team work, and I've improved my performance in committee work, even though people's ideas are often irrelevant and not well though-out, and unprincipled. Colleagues also know that I am strong, assertive and opinionated. I don't back down from confrontation. But yet am perceived to be caring, considerate and organized, which is gold to ESFJ's (strongest function extraverted feeling). I learn to give emotionally, at least on a superfcial level in order to work peacefully with the ESFJ's - it's a win win situation. -- Anonymous
A13 ...I'm curious about the gender differences within ENTP itself. Because it seems to me (based, admittedly, on very little research, i.e. socionics and a couple other states) that ENTp females are much, much more demonstrative than their male counterparts. It's not a T/F thing. -- Anonymous
A14 ENTPs are often genuinely cruel people. I've been living with an ENTP for about six months, and his whole life revolves around exploiting and disenfranchising other people. He approaches life like a virus. He acts like he thinks he's better than everyone. And the only person he is genuinely nice to is his girlfriend, an ISFP. Everyone else he is only nice to when he has something to gain, so he fits the ENTP uncovered description pretty well. He is obsessed with dominance and will do anything to move up the rungs of the social latter. Another ENTP who comes to mind is a female ENTP who sort of prides herself on being "hardcore." She's sort of a punk rock scene kid. She's nice (sort of) to her boyfriends and nice to the point of neediness with her best friend, my ex-girlfriend. When I used to hang out with her she was dating an ISFP, and my ex-girlfriend is an ISFP, so it fits the picture pretty well. She could be lively, energetic, and social but also ridiculously mean and judgemental. -- oo ro
A15 I agree with A2 and A3. The T(as well as the cold blooded logic) acts like an exoskeleton that protects all the soft spots. -- Dustbunny
A16 A14 I've never met a cruel ENTP. They're actually extremely fun to be around. They make me laugh and are really high energy. They really do care about people and I can't tell you how many times my ENTP room mate has shared things with me, and even though we aren't romantically involved he buys me drinks when we're out. You might be talking about an ESTP. -- Anonymous
A17 As an ENTP woman, I may consitently fail to saend you a birthday card. But, if you want someone who really,truly, understands who you are and will be there when you need me...I'm your girl. I don't have a huge tolerance for whining, particularly about the same thing over and over without action. If though, you want a friend who is committed to you while you are in the midst of a rough situation...again, I think an ENTP is in order. -- Anonymous
A18 i LOVE my dualz!!! i want one -- ISFP
A19 I am an ENTP. I am frank and that can be taken as "cold," but I simply look at and analyze the facts. As my good friend who is an INFP says about me, she knows that I care about her because I tell her the truth. Not to be cruel, but to show her other ways of looking at situations. Often, the personalities that think ENTPs (and ESTPs) are cold are Feelers who don't always look at reason. I also notice that ENTPs are warm when very close to someone, but because we are logical thinkers and analyze everything, we tend to over look how people view us and wonder why they are angry or hurt. Our reactions and comments are almost never to be cruel, but to be observent, honest and helpful. -- M
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