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| Questions & Answers |
| Question #1185435851 | Thursday, 26-Jul-2007 |
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| According to the ISTP uncovered profile, it says that they may need to hurt those they love in order to understand that they love them becaue of the peculiar nature of their hidden agenda. INTPs also have the same "hidden agenda" function ([Fi]). I take this as "wanting to love/like people" but constantly being disappointed and then "hurting" them. Does this imply physical/verbal abuse? -- Anonymous |
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| A55 Hi, I'm an ISTP girl (rare, so I hear...). I agree that I feel more for people in my life after I've hurt them. I think it's because prior to hurting them I behave quite unemotional (leading to the hurt, no doubt). Once I've upset them, this opens the doors to considering where my emotions are in the relationship - no, I don't think about/strongly feel my emotions in the first stages of a relationship with someone, just take it as it comes, see where it goes, no need for sentimentalities just yet! Once I've realised that I do actually feel and care for the person, I regret acting so cold. I do have feelings!, and I can feel their hurt! And if I say sorry I truly do mean it. Mostly though, expression of my feelings is difficult, I find it easier to write letters/texts than to meet/talk - I can usually trust what I'm writing down is true (because I'll edit it so many times until it feels right), whereas in person I only stay quiet, or respond with 'I don't know' or 'Sorry'. I've read a bit on ISTPs and about how I find it so difficult to correctly interpret my emotions, and appropriately express them... I'm not an emotional enough girl to able to 'delve deeper' than what I can 'interpret' though, but at least I'm aware that other people do 'feel' more than me, and can acknowledge and be sympathetic to this. On the whole, hurting my partners before committing to them is my pattern - how else can I most effectively push my own feelings to the surface, and trust their feelings are true(without their hurt response)? Actions speak louder than words! -- Anonymous |
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| A56 "Actions speak louder than words!" That has ISTP written all over it. As an ISTP guy, myself, I can relate to the notion of hurting those you love/care about the most. It's our way of creating a situation that is more concrete so we can better understand our emotions and the emotions of our loved ones. Without concrete reactions, we have no virtually no evidence to go by. It's definitely not the best way to go about trying to understand our emotions, but we frequently employ this tool. Also, writing what I feel is also much easier for me due to the ability to edit and get it just right. I stumble to no end when I have to talk about my emotions. It just comes out as incoherent garbage. -- Anonymous |
| A57 wth there is an ISTP guy at my work and he is really mean to people, even if they're new and nice to him. I DON'T GET IT!!! -- Anonymous |
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