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Question #1170290884Thursday, 1-Feb-2007
Category: INTj
Yea so... I'm an INTj and I tend to **** people off a lot. Its usually not intentional though. Its hard to explain but its kinda like im oversarcastic without putting the effort forward to be sarcastic. Its like I can't help myself. I can be rude and make controversial statements that hurts people feelings. Any other INTjs like this? -- Hitta
Your Answers: 1+ 20+
A1 The INTj's I know, haven't been like that. Usually they speak only when it's something important. And their jokes aren't insulting, at least not to the people around. But I don't know that many of them or that well. I'm INTp and one of my mottos is:"people who are insulted, deserve to get insulted". And I also can be rude and mocking, and also can make controversial statements, even if not true, just to see how people are going to react. But I'm not that horrible person, as I now seem to be. So maybe you are Myers-Briggs INTJ, that's socionics INTp. -- INTp
Moderator's comment
This is a common misconception - MBTI INTJ does not equal Socionics INTp
A2 I have an intj brother, and I think more people **** him off, than the other way around. I think some times people percive that intj's are carrying a chip on their shoulders. But I personaly think it is because intj are perfectionist in the things they do, and can not stand others critisism, as you are your worst critics. And because intj have no trouble making fast judgment calls (say things as they see it). Some may take this personally. And yes intj statments can be a bit extrem. -- d, INTP
A3 Re: A2, -- What some consider extreme, others may value as being clear, pure and genuine - a quintessential honesty worth striving for. It's not that all INTjs are just "rude", so people get mad. It can go deeper than that. For an example of an INXj with the motivation of love, yet stirring up the contempt of others (resulting in his own demise), read Jeremiah and Lamentations (Old Testament). -- blahblahblah
A4 "This is a common misconception - MBTI INTJ does not equal Socionics INTp" So what does it equal? -- guy
Moderator's comment
Sometimes INTp sometimes INTj
A5 I am an INTj (and an INTJ), and I think the problem is that people don't differentiate sarcasm from honest criticism. Sometimes I'll use sarcasm as an exaggerated way to make a point or notice a flaw. So while I mean what I imply, some people assume I'm just being a jerk. I guess it doesn't help that my face and tone don't change to show the difference. -- Anonymous
A6 I'm an INTJ as well. I used to make sarcastic remarks left and right. I've been making less and less lately due to me feeling more and more indifferent about things as learn how incredibly stupid some debates seem to me. But every once in a while I do make a sarcastic comment and I don't say it in a sarcastic manner like I used to, instead I just say it in what I think people perceive as a completely serious tone of voice with a straight face. Most people don't like that and see me as more or less of an a**hole. However sometimes I do make sarcastic jokes directed at my friends that are a bit more playful in nature and when I do this it's typically with a smile on my face so they know I'm just messing around. But even then I'm considered among my friends as a "friendly a**hole" -- Anonymous
A7 I'm an INTJ female (I haven't taken a socionics test) and I used to be incredibly sarcastic. I started noticing that certain people, whom I thought I was helping by pointing out with humour what I thought they needed to improve upon, would literally flinch after they said something stupid and look in my direction. I do have a heart and since then have made a concerted effort hold my tongue in situations where it just is not necessary to respond. On the other hand, part of my job is helping people develop themselves to their full potential, so instead of slicing their heads off with sarcasm and criticism, I've learned to use 'emotional language' and verbally express sympathy or empathy before I list all their damaging behavioral patterns. Another thing I've learned for talking to the more touchy types, is not to cringe when they want a hug, but actually to initiate physical contact on occasion (I'm referring to people I'm still getting to know) so they don't feel like I'm apathetic toward them. Usually, I care a great deal or I wouldn't be concerned that they are galavanting around like an idiot, in which case I would leave them to their own devices. I hope this helps. I think if you look at it as personal development it will be easier to convey that there is a heart pumping blood to your guillotine tongue. -- B
A8 It is usually the most unintelligent, uncouth or uneducated who use sarcasm ... and cynicism too goes hand in hand with an imprudent mind. -- Anonymous
A9 Being an INTx "asshole" only works around people smart enough to realize they're wrong. What good is rationalizing with wood-blocks? Initially, I give everyone the benefit of the doubt, and listen to potentially interesting opinions. My attempts to be "nice" to people cease altogether when they start answering rhetorical questions (with wrong answers they try to impose) at which point I start phrasing them more sadistically. That's as far as I'll go for "kindness." -- Anonymous
A10 Well, perhaps some of you would be interested to know that Hitta, the original poster, is most likely not an INTj, I hope this puts some perspective on this whole debate -- Admin
A11 Sarcasm is to me like stripes to a tiger and I'm an ENTP. I guess ENTPs and ENFPs can see the BS that eminates from other people,it's that NTs are better at pointing that out. -- Anonymous
A12 I am an INTj (just an INTj), and I also posess a touch of the sarcasm. That isn't my problem, though. I'm a real bastard when it comes to humor. My sense of humor is very dry, or deadpan. This confuses people easily, or it just upsets them. I can't really help it (it is too late by the time I realize I'm doing it). Anyway, I get a lot of people with the "deer caught in the headlights" look. Those that do understand my humor are usually people similar in personality type. They just get it. I think INTj's are just really good at masking emotion. They are hard to read. That has a tendency to upset people who don't understand dry or deadpan humor. -- Gaff
A13 Hitta's writing style is definitely not indicative of an INTj. -- Anonymous
A14 Well,this is most depends on you oun throught,i'm an Intj and i never make anything sarcastic,except some for defence.Anyway,for Intj,who dont care or care little about others,there is no reason for been rude.I believe that intj mind not for been rude,but for make way to understand.Become rude only for drop someone from you way,this is reason.I dont think that been rude without reason good thing.Intj looking for reasons most time. -- Intj Al
A15 Non INTJs are such fragile things... After a while on this set with an unmotivated supporting cast of 6 billion or so waiters and telemarketers, most INTJs (the superstar leading roles, directors, editors, critics, and audiences all rolled into one) intuitively learn to not really consider what the extras on the set are feeling, saying, and least of all thinking. From what I've seen INTJs get along great with fellow INTJs. Just remember to always be very mindful of your words around friends, significant others, and family members when communicating potentially negative points (tragedy, 'it's over baby', criticism, painful reality checks, 'my idea rocks and your is inefficient', etc.), double if what you are saying is the truth. Sounds arrogant, but INTJs are the human robots of the bunch. Self-absorbed independent logic robots who value their own well thought out opinion far above everyone else's. Downsides: it can be a pretty lonely life at times full of guilt trips with loved ones, a rollercoaster of a love life, and a bittersweet social life. Cheers! -- M
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A16 As an INTj, I think most of the type are just inconsiderate boobs, myself included. I have spent years learning to keep my mouth shut, except around people who are bright enough to catch my ironic and often sarcastic remarks (it helps to know your audience). At the same time, I try to reserve my sarcasm for those truly deserving of it, which, unfortunately, is well over half the population. -- cantgetenuffofstumbleupon
A17 It is easy to make statements towards other people without pre-evaluation of the situation. If they don't take the time and effort to learn how other people "work", how people possibly react to certain talks and so on, then they of course come over as being rude. It takes experience and modesty to learn strategy and diplomacy, dealing with people without manipulating people and though without ignoring peoples feelings/personalities. I know INTj who is very wise (but then, very old too) and I think he is some kind of "holy". But he is never rude, and if so it is because it just fits the situation and then he is normally right and it is instructive but funny at the same time. But I guess, most people are just arrogant, if they think they are right. But otherwise it should be allowed to anyone to just blurt out an opinion without thinking twice, because we are just human and stomach cancer is no good it just doesn't need to be so often INTj can be so much more. INFx -- Anonymous
A18 Thinking through what you want to say more carefully and balancing your thinking function with your feeling function might help with the problem. As for your question, I don't know about the majority, but I got an INTj for the socionics and so did a friend. Both of us rarely use sarcasm. -- Anonymous
A19 I, too, tested INTj positive (INTP MBTI), and I'd say I use sarcasm judiciously. When I do, it's typically me being more "seriously facetious", & I do it in a somewhat obvious JOCULAR/NICE-guy manner that I've learned to convey through my inflections, tone of voice, & a certain grin I purposely show on my face to cue others in that I'm just being good-natured. I use THIS kind of sarcasm to counter utter absurdity & diffuse potentially heated/too-needlessly-emotional situations that are generally much ado about relatively nothing that people shouldn't get THAT worked up about. Seriously. The rare times my facetiousness turns into actual biting/caustic SARCASM, though, typically means I'm trying to diffuse the hidden twitchy-eyed seething I feel inside of me when someone (or sometimes MANY people, simultaneously, over different things) continually pridefully BLATANTLY parades some set of stupid things they're saying and/or doing over & over...& over-n-over-n-over again-COMPETING/1-upping to actually SEE who can be the biggest idiot(s). -- Soc INTj, MBTI INTP, SLOAN rcoei, Enne 5w4
*Please note that the opinions expressed are not necessarily those of socionics.com*
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