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Question #1165878633Monday, 11-Dec-2006
Category: ENTp Personality Relationship Advice
I am a female entp and I have had difficulty in the area of finding men who do not think im weird, or arnt able to handle the unusualness of my personality. Is this a common problem with female entps (are men always expecting SFs?) or is this my own problem? what type be a good match for me? thank you -- joanne
Your Answers: 1+ 25+ 37+ 49+ 67+
A1 You mean to tell me ALL women aren't weird? Sounds to me like you're not describing a problem common to female ENTps, but to women in general. -- Dr. Kropotkin
A2 Based on my experiance with ENTP's I'd say they always prefer playing the dominant role in a relationship. I think the general idea is that you should look into hooking up with an introverted man. Another clue is that NP's tend to prefer sticking together, especially in close relationships. -- Z
A3 Oh yes, my dear doctor, I agree almost entirely with your analysis, but I must remind you about the Hienman Case of 1955. -- Dr. Boskonovitch
A4 Of course, my dear collegue, how foolish of me to have forgotten such a landmark case in the defence of women and their genetic susceptibility to nuttiness. -- Dr. Kropotkin
A5 Unfortunately we are kind of weird. it is just that we are only 3.2% of the population and that is combining men and women ENTP's there are a LOT more men than women ENTP's. Frankly I have been told I think like a man...and I am straight. Therefore there are some men who like that. Frequently they are more either ESFP or INTP -- Kay
A6 I have the same problem, not with dating but just in general. Go for introverted/nerdy guys. They can't stay away! -- aderly
A7 Detune, the geek factor and you should do just fine. ENTp's generally speaking can be socially gracious, and very fashionable (but it's usually with an eye toward exploiting their situation to their own ends). For men and women both, when it comes to dating if you're a die-hard Trekkie or a Dungeon Master/Mistress keep it to yourself until at least the third or fourth date! -- Anonymous
A8 As an ENTP male, even my buddies find me very hard to relate to. So I can understand why guys would find an ENTP woman strange. My litmus test for finding people I enjoy spending time with has always been to talk about some truly esoteric subject such as comparitive linguistics or odd-ordered harmonics in brass instruments and to see if the other person shows some genuine interest-if not in the actual subject, at least in the conversation itself. Doing things like this will, with luck, help you find a guy who is as fascinated by your mind as most men are by the physical feminine form. -- JReed
A9 why would esfp be attracted to entp? -- joanne
A10 @A9: ESFp and ENTp are superego partners. At first there is this "Ubermensch" quality to the other that is attractive but after that, without some effort to maintain the relationship things will slide down hill fast. -- Anonymous
A11 Im an ENTP female and I was married to an ENTJ. After my marriage, alot of ENTJ's were attracted to me, but I'm not too interested. The ENTP/ENTJ make better friends. I also dated an INFP (non-committal) and an ENFP (non-committal). I just got done quasi-dating an ESTJ and he told me I walked like a man. Whatever that means.... As an ENTP female I'm attracted to high IQ types. Not "smart" men, high IQ men. I had to explain to someone that there IS a difference. -- Luisa
A12 Luisa, I get the same comment from people too! I walk like a man (maybe this is due to my broad shoulders brought about by rowing) and think like one too. My friends don't turn to me when they're looking for sympathy - they turn to me when they're looking for brutal, frank advice. I've never been in a real relationship (everything were either flings or almost-there-but-not-quites) because one thing men always complain about me would be my domineering personality and obstinacy when it comes to gender roles. I'm a straight girl (100%!) but I just like taking the lead. ENTP women love making the first move, and I don't think it's something to lament about! -- Marga the ENTP
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A13 A9: Why would an ESFP be attracted to an ENTP? Because ENTPs can be very similar in behaviour to our duals, INTPs. Both these types are rational and creative in the way we like. I am an ESFP girl and just gone through a relationship with an ENTP guy. We got along very well, the only problem was we were both EP, so we were either both speaking or both silent. I need an INTP for a balanced conversation. Q: Joanne, your dual is an ISFP who might be exactly the person who would appreciate your rationality and decisiveness without stopping being himself. Btw, I know several ENTP women who are really appreciated by most men. I dont think men always expect SFs. Quite the opposite, I have noticed that my friends and colleagues (INFPs, ENTPs and ESFPs) are most fascinated by TP women. So dont hang your head down -- Ezis
A14 The ISFP male I know is passive, and well let people lead, but he loathes elitism, so various ENTps may want to keep that in mind (re: intellectual elitism). -- Jadae
A15 *sigh* If only more girls where of Thinking type. =) -- simoncpu
A16 I thought everyone was distributed somewhat evenly in terms of the functions? It's either here or Rick's Socionics site (www.socionics.us) that says Thinking and Feeling, Extraversion and Introversion, Intuition and Sensing, Judging and Perceiving are all divided up more or less equally. Maybe it's not that women aren't Thinking types so much as it is the effect of early stage "brainwashing"; in North American society, at least, there's a definite tendency towards telling women how to think, how to act, how to be attractive, etc. I've always wondered if men are just more free to pursue their interests and be themselves. Any thoughts? -- Anonymous
A17 A16 - I totally disagree. The only emotion men are allowed to express publicly is anger, for example. Anyone in the United States is free to pursue their interests, but no one is free from societal constraints and social trends and attitudes, some of which can be a very good thing by the way. Also, without more advanced analysis and thought I would say that the T versus F functions are not influenced by socialization or a person's upbringing, insofar as they are predestined at or before birth. A person may deny them or suppress them, however. -- econdude
A18 Well, to begin, you didn't really address my point (which was actually a question) about the distribution of T and F. Secondly, it seems that you took my hypothesis, assumed it was a concrete opinion, and then exaggerated it to ridiculous proportions in order to disprove it. I don't recall writing that men are free from societal constraints and women are bound by them. I merely suggested that perhaps men have *less* societal constraints. And I don't really think that point (question) was addressed either. . . -- Anonymous
A19 @A18: I would say the opposite, in todays society women are more free from societal constraints then men are. -- Anonymous
A20 Care to elaborate, A19? -- Anonymous
A21 @A20: Nowadays, is there really any other social constraint to women except regarding to the way they are supposed to look? Increasingly men have that too. But to add to that, the list of constraints men have is long, some of them even contradicting, because of changing society. Of course by reading Cosmo and junk like that, women can start to misbelieve that they have constraints. But if they drop that, they really won't become social rejects. -- A19
A22 I am an ENTP female who is partnered happily with and INTP male. On our second date he said he didn't have to compromise with my mind, body or personality. I'm outspoken, opinionated, and intense, and enjoy deep discussion, ardent debate, and learning about myself, others and the world. I did NOT get along very well with my ISTJ ex. He found me: 1) too serious 2) too unconventional 3) too independent The break-up of my ISTJ relationship (the first serious one I had) made me an MBTI convert. I can now understand why my partner and didn't work out - we wanted different things. I am no MUCH HAPPIER with my INTP mate. I love his depth as well as breadth of knowledge; I certainly enjoy learninf from him! -- Anonymous
A23 My best friend is an ENTP and would love to have a meaningful relationship with a guy. I do not know how to help her. In the past all the guys that have liked her are all Is but she's not in the least bit interested in them. She likes very strong headed extraverts! I have told her what suits her best, but she will not listen. If you find yourself an ISFP (5-7%) or ISTP (4-7%) and you share common interests and goals you should be happy. If you do not then to have a relationship you will have to stop being you and start living a lie. That of course is totally unacceptable and unsustainable. To be happy you have to be yourself and the two types that will allow you to be yourself and "love you just the way you are" are ISFP and ISTP. -- Anonymous
A24 My best friend is an ENTP and would love to have a meaningful relationship with a guy. I do not know how to help her. In the past all the guys that have liked her are all Is but she's not in the least bit interested in them. She likes very strong headed extraverts! I have told her what suits her best, but she will not listen. If you find yourself an ISFP (5-7%) or ISTP (4-7%) and you share common interests and goals you should be happy. If you do not then to have a relationship you will have to stop being you and start living a lie. That of course is totally unacceptable and unsustainable. To be happy you have to be yourself and the two types that will allow you to be yourself and "love you just the way you are" are ISFP and ISTP. -- Anonymous
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