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Question #1155470415Sunday, 13-Aug-2006
Category: ISTp INTp Hidden Agenda
how does the manifestation of the hidden agenda of istp differ from the one experienced by intp. does they experience it the same way? -- Anonymous
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Your Answers: 1+
A1 it's more or less the same for both types -- Anonymous
A2 INTPs love an object's strengths. ISTPs love an object's weaknesses. Both types know how to use love as a means of exploitation. -- Beloved
A3 @A2 could you explain about using love as a means of exploitation? Thanks. -- ENFP:)
A4 A2 must have misunderstood the hidden agenda, but people often seem to. Also in my opinion people overexagerate it's importance. It's something you secretly want, but hardly can admit it even to yourself, yet it still affects you. I believe that's why it has been highlighted in socionics, otherwise you wouldn't even notice you have such a motive. Contrary to what A2 said, I'd say it's just the opposite, intp & istp desire to love can be used as means to exploit them. I find love an uncontrollable thing that affects me, I couldn't use it to anything. If I start feeling anything like that, I will try to kill the feeling as fast as possible. But admittingly I would like to be in situation, where I could allow myself to love someone. Also I find it nearly impossible to "make" someone love me, and extremely difficult to to recognize if someone did love me, so I couldn't really use love as weapon to exploit someone. Maybe it could appear in that way to an outsider. But on the otherhand, there's some truth to that it would be morally easy (but difficult in practice) to use love as means of exploitation for me, as I find love as a weakness. And I might accidentaly do it also, by being oblivious about love. But to original question I have no answer. Maybe it's the same for istp. -- INTp
A5 I (ISTp) have always mistrusted what place intimate relationships could have in my life. I've always felt like a loner, an explorer ... spontaneous, daring, autonomous are more words I could throw out. So, how to find someone to come with me? I couldn't stand a "side-kick"; I absolutely must respect my friends & lovers & feel like they respect me as opposed to put me on a pedestal. In practice, I have fallen in love several times, but then I can switch that feeling off when circumstances turn me in a new direction. I've spent about 1/2 my adult time in a dating or marriage situation, and am currently focused on making it so my time *out* of such a situation gains in proportion. I just think other people's emotions don't run the way mine do, and I'm tired of others feeling hurt when I'm ready to move on. This may sound arrogant, but there is hardly any time in my adult life where I didn't have someone pursuing me, and in the past I think I "gave in" too easily, feeling willing to give things a chance. Now I think I'm just gonna have to stick to rejecting advances indefinitely, and I'm not entirely sad at this conclusion. But it certainly fascinates me that my Hidden Agenda is "to love" - if anything, I love to the point that the other party can't seem to let me go! -- iAnnAu
A6 I tend to agree with A2, I wouldn't call it exploitation but a necessary need. I naturally will help a weaker person or offer guidance and I suppose for an INTP they will seek someone else's stronger suit (such as spontaneity/fun/quirkyness.) -- ISTPunk
A7 Where can I meet another ISTP? I'm an INTp, fell in love with an ISTP last year, he died. And I want another one. Because we really clicked. Easiest company I've ever been around, and that sharp sense of humor! And breaking through his reserves to find love in there was wonderful. Yet ISTPs don't seem to troll around the net as much, and rarely seem to even be aware that they are ISTPs . . . -- Anonymous
A8 INTps are more likely to be hurt by love than hurt. It's the combination of Ni and the Fi hidden agenda. It's an all or nothing sort of thing and when an INTp gives all, then they really give all. Until they really feel hurt or betrayed and then they withdraw and that's the "nothing". And men are more fragile than women in that aspect. -- INTp woman
A9 my dad's an INTP, and the dude i'm seeing is an ISTP. my INTP dad manifests his love by sending me to a private school even though my parents could hardly afford it and telling me what i should and shouldn't do (w annoying frequency). my dad seems to like me a lot more when i succeed at school, work, daily chores, and when i keep my mouth shut. as for the ISTP dude i'm seeing, he gets aroused by my asking him for troubleshooting advice. don't know if this is a distinctively ISTP reactn, or just a male reactn. my playing a musical instrument also seems to turn him on. i know i'm talking ab/ diff types of love here, and diff types of r'ships, but it does seem like INTP's are more verbal in expressing themselves, and ISTP's more physical. and INTP's esteem competence while ISTP's r turned on by certain kinds of weakness in the other person. -- INFP
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