Socionics Personals
Female
Straight
16-25
Oceania
Libra
ENFj
Male
Straight
16-25
Middle East
Sagittarius
INTj
Male
Straight
26-35
North America
Pisces
INXj
Join now!


Questions & Answers
Question #1154736318Saturday, 5-Aug-2006
Category: Theory Duality
I am wondering if there is some difference in how successfully a dual relationship manifests (as well as in relationships of supervison) that hindges on the fairly significan perceiving function N & S split. The question is based on my empirical experience with friends, family for over 30 years. So far, I have met **many** couples in successful relationships of supervision (istj/esfp) (intj/enfp) (esfj/istp) (enfj/intp)... and (entp/infj) (entj/infp) (estp/isfj)- all of these relationships are fine and the partners are friends with good communication and cooperation - however, i have YET to meet anyone in a successful dual relationship. most of the people who've intereacted with duals have ranged in fleeting lust to tollerance to outright hatred for each other- perhaps relations of supervision do not work when mixing between N/S but they seem to work *quite well* when it is N/N or S/S..unlike dual relationships (or at least with all the people i know) currently it seems that keirsy's theory seems more accurate & realistic for ideal match-ups. thanks for any feedback and sorry for the long post. (nerdgrrl- infj) -- Anonymous
Your Answers: 1+
A1 Wow, thanks for posting! I've seen supervision marriages work well with, too and your post affirms my suspicions. I experienced such a relation and it will always feels intimate in terms of our connection/understanding of each other, and natural, respectful empathy. I've also seen people pair up well with super-ego's - at least, for a time - and experience intimacy. (Not sure about the potential for endurance, though). But the dual marriages I've seen are intense, even good - yet I really have often wondered if it IS the ultimate fatal attraction rather than "ideal"! Attraction - yes, definitely. But intimacy and understanding and total acceptance? So far, I've seen the reverse far more often! As soon as a problem emerges, each knows how to hit the other's weakness without even realizing it, in how they go about dealing with it. Any aspect of duals getting along seems accidental and illusory, upon studying the mechanics of it all (e.g., entp-isfp, estp-infp x2). I've had close family members in relations of duality (multiple) - have seen the initial, intense romance and the years of disillusionment and pain to follow thereafter. And yes, they CAN sever ties ... even after years. So all in all, MUCH more research needs to be done before anyone begins basing serious decisions on this info. Also, I've found it is helpful to assume that you and whomever have the BEST mix, so you try harder to see the good in your interactions, and be more accepting and understanding of the other person rather than approach them with a preconceived agenda of what the "pitfalls are." If the theory is wrong, you can still believe you have problems that are unsurmountable, and blow them out of proportion, when that may not be the truth of it! -- anotherAnonymousPoster
A2 My ENFp girlfriend and I mesh seamlessly. The relationship has lasted well beyond what I had initially thought simply because we intuitively seem to understand and accept one another's idiosyncrasies. I was married to an ESFj, my dual, for 14 years. I never understood her values that seemed to change with public opinion and popular trends, and she was never comfortable with my introverted nature nor my impassive logic. -- I/O
A3 Hi, I'm the original poster of A1 and my studies have now lead to a change of opinion. So disregard everything I posted there. It seems highly probably that the introverted j/p flip has generated mistyping, and I wonder how much that me be true of those whom the original questioner believe they have id'd. I do now affirm that the stress and worst compatibility attributed to conflicting relations is true. Relations of Supervision in marriage probably generate a lot of problems, ESPECIALLY if the woman is the Supervisor. When a male ego is so deflated because she doesn't trust his judgment on things, and indeed seems to "have to take the lead" for all the things he doesn't "do right" - that is just a recipe for unresolved tensions and lack of fulfillment for the Supervisor. It would feel like caretaking more than partnership. -- Anonymous
A4 I was in a relationship of supervision with an INTj and while we are great friends to this date, I found him to be like a father figure versus a partner and lover. I ended it because of this so I'm not a fan of long term potential of relationships of supervision. As an ENFp I have much stronger leanings towards other types and, yes, the ISTp types can be very appealling to me. -- Anonymous
A5 I am ENTp in relation to ISFp. I was in relation to ESTj and ENFj and: 1. Dont forget what socionics is all about... SEX! Ne dont like to have sex with Ni... 2. Living with ESTj is an ASSYMETRIC relation, and it burns over time. -- Anonymous
A6 This Intp(female) who is 5 years older than me and i am 20 me (enfj) and i think i am fairly attracted to her even tho she isn't phsyically all that attarctive -- Anonymous
A7 ESTjs are hot. -- ISFp
A8 I love ISTp's deep and precise logic and their light and clever humour. And I like how most times (unfortunately not always) I feel genuinely and deeply cared for in their presence. Oh and omg their so HOT ! -- ENFp who loves an ISTp
A9 yea, conflicting relations ARE the worst relations! I've experienced one! But quasi-identical relations often look similar, but it's not the kinda mistake u wanna make, haha! But judging introverts r expressed as perceiving introverts and perceiving introverts are expressed as judging! Confusing:) But we'v broken up! -- Anonymous
A10 @A7, haha, indeed -- ISFp
Bookmark and Share

A11 I dated an ISFp, my dual, (socionics, not mistyped) and it was great. Duality works, as long as you type correctly. -- Anonymous
A12 i find isfps incredibly beautiful in and out - entp -- thomas
A13 A5- What do you mean Ni doesn't like to have sex with Ne? What the hell does that mean and how do you know that? -- Anonymous
A14 A7- Yes, yes they are. But only the hot ones. -- Anonymous
*Please note that the opinions expressed are not necessarily those of socionics.com*
Page 1
Would you like to add anything?
(When posting, we ask you to make the effort to qualify your opinions.)



Name: (leave blank for "Anonymous")

Related
 
10 Most recent
By category
All questions
Submit a question