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| Questions & Answers |
| Question #1103061923 | Tuesday, 14-Dec-2004 |
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| What's the most narcissistic type? INFp? -- Anonymous |
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| A18 Well thought out A17, that is like an ordered version of what I try to think about in combating my own potential narcism(now I'm sure of it, actually). In saying that, you have set up a situation where it is much easier and less hurtful and altogether less confusing to identify as a narcisist, I'm not sure whether thats a good thing or a bad thing, but if its unconscious, its really difficult to help it, especially for we J's since we tend to get stuck in ruts. It would take incredible bravery and discipline to even outwardly overcome narcism, and from what I see, its next to impossible to completely overcome it since the source of your discipline and work would only be from a narcisistic source. But what the hell do we do now, wait? It troubles me because it might be what prevents me from having friends and I probably use their prescence to feel a sense of completeness. Its like everyone wants to dislike me but they can't because there is no outward reason for them to. But that's fairly normal right? Its sad(most importantly because its a self loss), but what can we do about it, I'm only 16. I think I'm an INTJ but I'm not sure. Every person who I've identified as an INTJ was somewhat like that, its like we all have a hole in ourselves. But maybe its no longer narcisism if we reduce it to that. Maybe we INTJs are not afraid to admit it? -- Anonymous |
| A19 Hello A18, I'm the one who wrote A17. There's a lot on the web about narcissists. In almost every case the discussion is very specific to one particular narcissist type. Don't trust loose postings on the subject. Just like everyone else, even those of us who are narcissists are very different from one another. To go out and really understand yourself, or at least to discover whether you are indeed a narcissist, it's imperative that you read only from recognized experts on the subject (I listed some books in my A17 posting). I hope you discover that you are not one of us. We're really not good at all for those who are closest to us. But when it comes to personality tests like the Myers-Briggs you have to pay for those tests, but there are some close approximations to that test out there. Also there's information on what each character (the I, the N, the T, the J) of your type is all about. Here are a couple of links: http://similarminds.com/jung.html http://www.personalitypathways.com/type_inventory.html Good luck. It sounds like you too are among the less popular individuals. Because of that, you need to take every test you can get your hands on to understand your own personality, your capabilities, and your weaknesses. Armed with that, target yourself toward becoming the best you can possibly be in your chosen profession, a profession centered on your strengths. If you become really good at something it results in others developing respect for you. That respect can override any personality deficiencies in dealing with people. Also, supervisory and management courses are really good because they help you gain insight into how best to interface with people. I'm an old guy who has followed a path like yours. I'm just trying to help. -- Anonymous |
| A20 Alright, maybe I got a little philisophical and confused. I'm gullable and I see things differently when I have bad days. I'm just anxious because I can't know or figure out the truth about anything for sure, indicating that I'm possibly a socionics F. Having high standards for ones self out of fear from being singled out as weak or pathetic or simply to avoid emotional tension is a totally different thing. But I'm a little concerned. Can you help me identify what my type is based on what you see here? -- Anonymous |
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| A21 To A20 .. No .. Not enough information to identify someone else's type but you seem to be putting your efforts in the right places. I hope you took the the "long" test for Socionics. Did you take both the "normal mode" and "reverse mode" tests? It's probably not wise to take short cuts considering the importance this seems to hold for you. By the way, when I took the Myers-Briggs test, a very useful aspect of the feedback was the part that told me about how my traits change when I'm under pressure. Very useful information. Good luck! -- Anonymous |
| A22 I am an INFP, and I DEFINITELY would not consider myself narcissistic. Narcissism, if I'm correct, is an extreme love for yourself? Or, something along the lines of that. Anyways, I have a terribly low self-esteem, and one of my good friends, another INFP, does too. INFP = Narcissistic? Nope. -- Anonymous |
| A23 The INFJ is more manipulative then the ESTP.. trust me.. the INFJ can kick the s**t out the the ESTPs manipulation with his own... its quite a sight when the INFJ uses the estp against themselves -- DLG |
| A24 ESTp's by far are the most narcissistic type. anyone saying otherwise does not truly understand the ESTp way of handling society. I'm not saying all ESTps are narcissistic, but if there was a contest for the worst possible level of human behavior it would be the ESTp that would reign as champion with no other type any where near. There are a large amount of ESTps in the world population. Many more than any other type by a wide margin. It seems that there is a fairly well distributed amount of personality types in society, but it is an illusion. The ESTp fills many roles in society and can look like many types with their behaviors. Many people on this site are ESTp and mistake themselves for other types. Appearances truly are deceiving in the world of personality! A2's experience with the ESTp is pretty standard when another type engages in a relationship. Again i'm talking about the unhealthy ones. They express a strong facade that is friendly in the beginning and after some time they show their true cold self. I've seen it many, many times. It is a common occurrence in society. I call the unhealthy ESTps the Con Men/Women, because everything they say and do are in their best interest no matter how it will make people feel around them. -- Anonymous |
| A25 A24: The actions of the ESTp don't make you feel anything. You're the person who is choosing to feel, or react, in a certain way to a ceratin set of circumstances or actions. The intent of an ESTp is not malicious. However, your own insecurity projects malicious intent onto the ESTp. There is only 1 person responsible for your own emotions, and that person is you. -- Anonymous |
| A26 A25, are you serious? That a persons actions should have no effect on a others emotions unless they allow it? Really? This isn't human -- An INFj |
| A27 A26: It most certianly is, once you understand how to observe your ego, instead of identifying with it. That's the heart of enlightenment. -- An INFp |
| A28 A25, if you are an ESTp and counter attacking my statement, then you must be a Ti ESTp subtype. You use logic to govern your emotions. That is what you described there. You have to understand that there are different types out there that have a Feeling function as there 1st and 2nd and what you said would never fly with them, and they are not wrong to feel that way. Ethics and Logic are both very important to the balance of the world. There is a reason why ethical and logical types exist. That was not a random accident. So it is east to write off emotions if your a logical type, and it is the same e versa, but both types of judging are vital to society, otherwise society would desolve into chaos. Like i said if you are a ESTp, you are not a natural Fi function user, you would use Fe to govern the world of feeling. Fe is not a very deep feeling function unless it is backed up by a decently strong Fi. Fe basically allows you to manuever through society with out causing to much trouble due to your behavior in public. Fi types tend to feel their emotion internally and that is a very unpleasant experience if you have to deal with someone that is very negligent in this area. The Fi type will usually avoid some one like that like they have the plague. It hurts inside to much to deal with those types of people. If you haven't guessed the ESTp is very capable of hurting people with decently strong Fi in inexplicble ways. Unhealthy ESTps do not know how their behavior truely effects the poeple around them, so it is easy for them to think that everyone should guard their feelings like they do. This is not a reality for anybody that values Fi, and it should not be imposed on them. The main thing i'm trying to convey here is to not simply write of ethics because it does not apply to you so much (eventhough it should). It is extremely important that we have people on both sides of the judging functions spectrum to continue moving in a positive path for the future of the human race. -- Anonymous |
| A29 A25: What a load of crap. When a person is hurt they don't take the time to ask themself, "how do I choose to feel about this?"... they just feel. -- Anonymous |
| A30 A29: They might not ask themselves how they choose to feel, but they most certainly have the choice to observe the emotion, rather than identifying with it. Doing so not only accesses higher levels of awareness, but it allow you to see where others are coming from, as you are no longer blinded by the needs of your own ego. -- INFp guy |
| A31 A28: Emotions are a human construct. They can be unlearned just as they were taught to you by your parents, guardians, and society at large. What we perceive through our senses is not a human construct. It cannot be unlearned because it is not governed by how you "feel" about it...it's just here. Attaching an emotion to an event is taking what is in front of you and bastardizing it based on your own egoic viewpoint. Such projection of the ego is the driving force behind all "evil" in this world. -- INFp guy |
| A32 I reject the notion that certain types are inherently narcissistic. My reasoning for this is based the principles of intertype compatibility and the doubtfulness of the utility of egoism in providing psychological complementarity. In plainer terms, I am skeptical that individuals of a certain sociotype are actively motivated to seek out narcissism. Another interesting implication of assuming that narcissism is linked to sociotype is the logical necessity of supposing that the polar opposite attributes of self-destruction and suicidal ideation also share clear links to sociotypes, and of course there would be intertype considerations for that as well. So yes, the ramifications of this notion are somewhat ludicrous. -- a person |
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