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ESTp Uncovered, When Nobody Loves Me
by I/O
ESTp are consummate snake-oil salespeople who have only one goal in life: to sell themselves or their ideas. If ESTp cannot gain your love or admiration, they will settle for your submission. ESTp are fast-moving and fast-talking, and seek the finer things in life, even though, those things may belong to you. However, ... they would be quite generous to others with your things.
Rules and laws are seen only as guidelines for ESTp. If they decide that something needs to be done, then they'll do it regardless of who gets hurt. Their wants and needs take precedence over any rules. They're outspoken risk-takers who don't mind getting their hands really dirty. ESTp live in the here-and-now, and place little importance on introspection or consequence.
Getting an ESTp to finish or commit to something is like trying to land a large tuna - one must come prepared for a fight. The ESTp will leave a trail of unfinished business and relationships. Their live-in-the-moment philosophy drives them to continually seek new relationships and challenges, while existing projects and people bore them. Issues that require focus and concentration will sap the ESTp of energy while the fight to avoid chores will invigorate them. ESTp remain committed only as long as there is a real impending threat to them, but they will remain totally bored with everybody and everything that is familiar.
As clever as an ESTp may be, following instruction will be the most difficult chore for them. The ESTp will often have trouble in school; they see little use of theory in their insatiable quest for new things and experiences. ESTp intuition is often wrong so they don't trust theory or their instincts, and is highly suspicious of the instincts of others. They're only interested in physically what you have and what you can give - forget the intangibles.
ESTp are proud of the fact that they don't plan because they feel they can manoeuvre in any situation. They typically makes things up as they go. However, they react more than they think; they make rash decisions and then have to fix them. They're always improvising because they use so little intuition. Their decisions and actions are based upon their understanding of the facts at hand, which are frequently incomplete, especially when the situation involves people.
ESTp use their ability to perceive attitudes and motivations to get what they want out of people. Having a strong flair for drama and style, they're very good at manipulating the truth and improvising to suit the situation. They can be extremely charming initially. However, they will eventually squeeze all the fun and energy out of relationships. As boredom sets in, their sensual nature becomes more earthy, caring little about the effect their words have on you. Their fast-paced lives will leave many friends in the dust.
ESTp approach intimacy from a shallow, physical perspective rather than from any depth of affection. They may verbally express words of affection during intimacy but never really mean any of them. They do not care what others are feeling unless they're after something, and when they get it, they usually won't express any gratitude - it's like a conquest. For them, actions speak louder than words, and words, other than their own, are irrelevant. People who require affirmation should avoid ESTp. The gift that an ESTp will give to an old friend is a toy with which they have finished playing, or one which needs a partner. They consider gifts more like tools that are reserved for gaining new conquests.
The ESTp needs to keep moving, and will place much effort into ensuring (s)he is not restricted or confined. They feel stifled and unhappy when dealing with routine chores. However, they get very excited about new endeavours, and have the ability to motivate abettors (lemmings towards the sea). Although they have talent for getting many things started, ESTp finish little. If one starts a project or relationship with an ESTp, expect to have to provide all the follow-through.
ESTp are one of the most exciting but challenging types to be around. They immerse themselves in risky situations providing non-stop action, and will suck you along with them. They are competitors that want to beat everybody into the ground - especially their old friends. They are drawn toward games of skill that offer an opportunity to defeat others. This, coupled with their tendency to cheat, makes them formidable opponents. Their own sense of personal integrity has the theme: "my way is the only way". Their rash enthusiasm and excitement-loving nature toward risk make them dangerous companions.
You know you're in the realm of an ESTp when every flat surface is piled with "borrowed" items and junk.
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Your Comments: 1+ 15+ 33+ |
C15 My room is not filled with borrowed junk. On the contrary I pride myself on items I worked for alone, being so stubborn as to refuse items given to me that I should probably take as it's a sign of weakness from me. Would you befriend a person that served you nothing in the friendship but hardships? No! Everyone wants something from someone, whether to be recognized, affirmed, validated, assisted, loved, understood..to grow with them, have company...so don't tell me an ESTP does it to get something like it's a bad thing. I think an ESTP at his worst? Yeah, he's going to rip through hell or high water to take what he needs at any expense; but typically i as an ESTP find it very difficult to do anything inherently bad, there's an order to things. As Winston Churchill said, "Desperate times call for desperate measures." Oh wait, he was an ESTP too. ESTPs are very clean cut and tactical minded, taking only what they need to get a job done. We do not over indulge and often break ourselves to accomplish something on our own before even looking around for help, or "money" and stuff from other people. -- ungesehensoldat |
C16 Pretty typical INTj rant about how ESTp's are the devil and not to be trusted because our soul purpose in life is to destroy INTj's, isn't it. -- Anonymous |
C17 I'm an ESTp, here are my criticisms of this article: -Hoarding things is an ENTp trait, not an ESTp trait. I actually make ENFj's uncomfortable because I pay them back down to the penny. -at least the ISTp article mentioned somewhere in there that they are happy people. This mentions nothing of the sort. -our "rash decisions" only seem rash to outsiders who can't see the flash of thousands of images and weighted options in under a second that pass through our mind when making a decision. From the outside, its as if we just close our eyes, tuck our head and sprint forward without looking where we're going. Not only is that insulting, but no one does that. Not even US Marines. The phrase "rash decisions" implies a complete ignorance of our mental process. We simply think faster than most people without the anxiety clouding our judgement. -I would probably agree with this article if I were raised by orks. -- Anonymous |
C18 This was the worst thing I ever read. Thanks for ruining my life -- Anonymous |
C19 I hate to say this but it describes my ESTP ex in every sense. He cheated on me with three other girls. I guess I can blame it on his brain lol -- LK |
C20 "However, they will eventually squeeze all the fun and energy out of relationships." I disagree. ESTps will stay with a relationship as long as it is fun. When other types try to make things to serious then they leave. Other types might see this at taking out fun but fun for ESTP is joy not work. "They do not care what others are feeling unless they're after something, and when they get it, they usually won't express any gratitude - it's like a conquest." ESTps don't generally care who people feel unless it effects the space in which they live or work. They want people happy but they aren't afraid to anger people if it will move things in the direct in which they see fit. They definitively aren't so callus as to not to express gratitude. They just aren't superfluous like ENFjs or ESFjs. "ESTp remain committed only as long as there is a real impending threat to them, but they will remain totally bored with everybody and everything that is familiar." Commitment has nothing to do with a threat to an ESTp. committed appeals to the ESTp's Ti. ESTps are committed to an idea set in logic. Any threat to an ESTP is going to met with an equal or usual greater threat. -- AB |
C21 "They may verbally express words of affection during intimacy but never really mean any of them. They do not care what others are feeling unless they're after something, and when they get it, they usually won't express any gratitude - it's like a conquest" That is actually so wrong. Just because you had a bad experience with one ESTP doesn't mean it applies to all ESTP, so that you have the right to say that those traits describe ESTP because they don't. I never say something I don't mean when it comes to my feelings. It's not that we don't take feelings / emotional things seriously (esp with romance), in fact we do thats why we hesitate and take things slow because we know we're not good at it, unlike logic which comes natural for us. ESTP may seem really confident and strong on the outside but some are probably as fragile and not anywhere near stronger than an INFP. -- an estp |
C22 Seriously if all the estp read this we would shut you down. I mean it's terribly offending to be read like this - souless bastards who would take every penny off of you. It's biased, inconsistent and imbalanced!! There are estp's that could be priests as there could be infj's that are serial killers. You either revise your article or you are definitively misunderstood and partially unreliable - which is, Im afraid to say, unreliable. There are good ESTPs and bad as there are good priests and bad. I mean what the hell is "would give you a gift we're done using" man? You find an ESTP cheap? Maybe if you were someone we're trying to show sarcasm to then too bad for you. What an ESTP is is CALCULATING and TRYING TO BE EXACT especially in social settings. We already have a sense of what the outcome should be, it'll only depend on the amount of resources we have and how we'd like to distribute them properly in the process. We're not cheap, we are exact and we are smooth. An ESTP will always try to give you the impression we want you to get. That's what you remember. -- Robocop |
C23 As if posting once wasn't enough for me. This article I don't see fit being called an article. Perhaps it should be recalled as Subjective Conundrum into Founded Facts. Conclusively, in my opinion, it is a biased and twisted re-write of the true ESTP article. Unfair and misjudged. -- Robocrop |
C24 I would say this is incredibly biased and far from objective. The tone sounds like someone was dumped by an ESTp and is bitter. Lets remember that these are human personalities and no two are alike, experiences and nature enter equally into the equation and this scathing description is laughable and unprofessional. -- Anonymous |
C25 This is so nasty and unfair. I hope someone paints a terrible (untrue) picture of you and you get to read a bunch of comments from people getting their jollies out of agreeing with each other about how awful you are. I am 100% ESTP and am a loved wife, daughter, friend and a great asset to my clients. Just because you have a bad experience with an ESTP doesn't make them all bad people. I do not think I have read anything so bitter before. Do you need a hug? -- Anonymous |
C26 100% biased. Sounds like this persons heart was broken by an ESTP. We aren't all evil. -- Anonymous |
C27 It's articles like this that give people like you our patented "death stare." You CAN feel it through the computer monitor can't you? -- Anonymous |
C28 My own personal experience with a female ESTP agrees with every point of the article. And I was really excited about the prospect of finding duality. There is no way I would ever go there again! -- INFJ/p |
C29 C28, because you knew someone who went to the dark side, your Jedi knight may still be out there, and is likely an ESTp. -- Anonymous |
C30 I am an INFJ/p. ESTp's are my Duals. Depicted in this article is the 'full blown' ESTp. Most people are only partially their type, they have between 50 and 100% of each function of their type. I would mostly agree with the article -it's a little mean but not entirely wrong. Especially the INFps need to know where their Dual ESTP "come from" because they are SO attractive to them, and the concept of Duals is a little deceiving. Most of the times, the ESTp-INFp relationship is one of pure horror. Duality is only possible when these partners have grown to accept responsibility for 1) their own survival (INFps), and 2) commitment to other and feelings of others (ESTps). Often, this will only happen when they are in their late 30, or even later in life. As a rule, we have to accept responsibility for all our shortcomings before we can successfully partner up with someone so different from ourselves as our Dual. If and when this happens, I think the relationship has a good chance to be really exciting. -- The Female INFJ/p |
C31 I have known 4 ESTp females and 2 males. Only 1 of the females did take personal relationships seriously. I had a good time with the other 3 females (they were good friends). I did want to get serious with 1 of the females but that did not go well the commitment, is what I think the issue was with her and she had a lot of things going on in her life at the time. But they were all fun people to hang around with for a bit. I have no animosity for this type. -- INTp = INTJ |
C32 You must indulge in a contest for among the greatest blogs over the internet. Ill suggest this web website! efgecekcedgbageg -- Smithg124 |
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